
Regretting Motherhood
A Study
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Narrated by:
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Mandy Kaplan
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By:
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Orna Donath
About this listen
Women who opt not to be mothers are frequently warned that they will regret their decision later in life, yet we rarely talk about the possibility that the opposite might also be true - that women who have children might regret it. Drawing on years of research interviewing women from a variety of socioeconomic, educational, and professional backgrounds, sociologist Orna Donath treats regret as a feminist issue: as regret marks the road not taken, we need to consider whether alternative paths for women currently are blocked off. She asks that we pay attention to what is forbidden by rules governing motherhood, time, and emotion, including the cultural assumption that motherhood is a "natural" role for women - for the sake of all women, not just those who regret becoming mothers.
If we are disturbed by the idea that a woman might regret becoming a mother, Donath says, our response should not be to silence and shame these women; rather, we need to ask honest and difficult questions about how society pushes women into motherhood and why those who reconsider it are still seen as a danger to the status quo. Groundbreaking, thoughtful, and provocative, this is an especially needed book in our current political climate, as women's reproductive rights continue to be at the forefront of national debates.
©2017 Orna Donath (P)2018 North Atlantic BooksListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
"Donath breaks open what she describes as an 'unspoken taboo,' bringing the notion that women regret becoming mothers into the public discourse with her latest research....The most valuable elements of the book are the different perspectives provided by the interviews, which reflect a striking amount of self-awareness (and, often, suffering) from women who have otherwise largely kept silent." (Publishers Weekly)
"Forthrightly feminist ... Donath's study fills a gap in discussions of women's lives and choices. While it will undoubtedly be a hard pill for many to swallow, it is also a necessary one." (Foreword Reviews)
"Donath carves out a much-needed space for these women to share, in their own words, stories about how they got to where they are, and how they manage now. Mixed in with these interviews is analysis by Donath, who expertly examines and questions the structures of a capitalistic, patriarchal society that not only contributes to women finding themselves in this position, but also prevents them from speaking about it. Many have never heard sentiments like the ones shared by Donath's interviewees - and that needs to change." (BUST Magazine)
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Opened My Eyes
- By Cenita W. on 12-29-22
By: Valorie Burton
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Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes...in You and Your Kids
- By: Scott Turansky, Joanne Miller
- Narrated by: Dan John Miller
- Length: 6 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller offer a thorough program for establishing honor as a basis of family life - not just children honoring parents, but parents respecting children and children honoring each other. Even if honor seems a long way off in your household, you will find practical suggestions here to bring that goal a little closer - suggestions for kids of all ages. Honor is the biblical value that will bring about good behavior. It’s more than just changing what kids do; it’s changing the deeper issues of the heart that triggered the behavior.
By: Scott Turansky, and others
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Your Hidden Superpower
- The Kindness That Makes You Unbeatable at Work and Connects You with Anyone
- By: Adrienne Bankert
- Narrated by: Adrienne Bankert, Bill Krause
- Length: 5 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Kindness isn’t merely about getting along with people and being nice. It’s a game changer in business, the door opener to opportunity, and the key to authenticity and confidence. It’s a superpower that can be honed through an intentional lifestyle of kindness and is especially important in these divisive times.
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Great content . Thought provoking. A MUST READ !!!
- By David W. Johnson on 12-13-20
By: Adrienne Bankert
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The Archetype Diet
- Reclaim Your Self-Worth and Change the Shape of Your Body
- By: Dana James
- Narrated by: Dana James
- Length: 6 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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In working with thousands of women who wanted to lose weight and change the shape of their bodies, leading nutritionist Dana James observed a striking trend: no matter how diligent they were in sticking to their diet and exercise plans, old behavioral patterns and self-doubt sabotaged their efforts. In The Archetype Diet, James helps listeners escape the seemingly endless psychological tug-of-war that is hampering their ability to care for themselves and explains which hormones cause you to store body fat on your belly, thighs and hips, and what to eat to change it.
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Bought the book too!
- By MommaD on 09-30-18
By: Dana James
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Even After Everything
- The Spiritual Practice of Knowing the Risks and Loving Anyway
- By: Stephanie Duncan Smith
- Narrated by: Stephanie Duncan Smith
- Length: 6 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Exquisitely told and urgently resonant, Even After Everything is a love letter to anyone who has opened their heart only to be hurt. Stephanie Duncan Smith proposes that it’s not through grit or forced resilience that you will find a way forward, but through receiving the full spectrum of our lives, just as we receive the empathy of God-with-us in every moment.
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Beautiful
- By Amy Sytsma on 11-27-24
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When My Time Comes
- Conversations About Whether Those Who Are Dying Should Have the Right to Determine When Life Should End
- By: Diane Rehm, John Grisham - foreword
- Narrated by: Diane Rehm, Susan Bennett, Dan Bittner, and others
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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The renowned radio host and one of the most trusted voices in the nation candidly and compassionately addresses the hotly contested right-to-die movement, of which she is one of our most inspiring champions. The basis for the acclaimed PBS series.
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Beautifully done - and so necessary...
- By WMB on 03-03-20
By: Diane Rehm, and others
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Your Fully Charged Life
- A Radically Simple Approach to Having Endless Energy and Filling Every Day with Yay
- By: Meaghan B. Murphy
- Narrated by: Meaghan B. Murphy
- Length: 7 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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The Fully Charged Life is Murphy's practical guide to bringing your best self to every moment, even when the pressures of daily life leave you feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, and wallowing in negative thoughts (and a pint of your favorite gelato). Spanning health, work, family time, and more, this book reveals small changes in outlook and habits that yield big results, without ever sacrificing who you are.
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Boring
- By Laura on 03-27-21
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Build the Damn Thing
- How to Start a Successful Business If You're Not a Rich White Guy
- By: Kathryn Finney
- Narrated by: Kathryn Finney
- Length: 6 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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An indispensable guide to building a start-up and breaking down the barriers for diverse entrepreneurs from the visionary venture capitalist and pioneering entrepreneur Kathryn Finney. Build the Damn Thing is a hard-won battle-tested guide for every entrepreneur who the establishment has left out. Finney, an investor and start-up champion, explains how to build a business from the ground up, from developing a business plan to finding investors, growing a team, and refining a product.
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Solid information
- By TonyaA6 on 07-25-22
By: Kathryn Finney
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The Lies We Believe
- Renew Your Mind and Transform Your Life
- By: Dr. Chris Thurman
- Narrated by: Henry O. Arnold
- Length: 9 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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In this completely revised and updated edition, psychologist Dr. Chris Thurman guides the listener through the lies we believe about ourselves, relationships, life, men, women, and, most important, God. He then unpacks the 12 essential truths for emotional health and the truth about God - the ultimate source of Truth. This easy-to-follow guide to renewing the mind helps identify problem areas and the midcourse correction needed in how we view ourselves and our world.
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Revision needed better editing
- By KKopp on 02-04-22
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Retirement Reinvention
- Make Your Next Act Your Best Act
- By: Robin Ryan
- Narrated by: Robin Ryan
- Length: 8 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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In Retirement Reinvention, America's most trusted career coach shatters the myths that retirement is the end of work, that it is a time of decline, that new career opportunities are for young people alone, and that people work during their retirement only because they need money.
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Redundant and unhelpful
- By Angela on 05-16-19
By: Robin Ryan
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Getting Back to Happy
- Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Reality, and Turn Your Trials into Triumphs
- By: Marc Chernoff, Angel Chernoff, Alyssa Milano - foreword
- Narrated by: Marc Chernoff, Angel Chernoff
- Length: 8 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Through their popular blog Marc & Angel Hack Life, Marc and Angel Chernoff have become go-to voices in the area of personal development, reaching tens of thousands of fans each day with their fresh and relatable insights. Now they're writing the book they wish they'd had when they needed it most. Getting Back to Happy reveals their strategies for changing thought patterns and daily habits to bounce back from tough times.
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Great for Happiness Beginners
- By Speckers on 07-26-18
By: Marc Chernoff, and others
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Parenting Beyond Power
- How to Use Connection and Collaboration to Transform Your Family -- and the World
- By: Jen Lumanlan MS MEd
- Narrated by: Jen Lumanlan MS MEd
- Length: 5 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Research-based parenting educator Jen Lumanlan offers a simple yet revolutionary framework for rethinking our relationships with children. This new approach helps us to look beneath challenging behaviors to find and meet children’s needs, and ours too—perhaps for the first time in our lives. It involves empathetic listening, understanding feelings and underlying needs, and problem-solving with our children to find solutions to conflicts that work for everyone.
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An aproach that meets everyone's needs in resolving conflicts.
- By MDekko on 05-04-24
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Build for Tomorrow
- An Action Plan for Embracing Change, Adapting Fast, and Future-Proofing Your Career
- By: Jason Feifer
- Narrated by: Jason Feifer
- Length: 7 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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We experience change in four phases. The first is panic. Then we adapt. Then we find a new normal. And then, finally, we reach the phase we could not have imagined in the beginning, the moment when we realize that we wouldn’t go back. Build for Tomorrow is designed to accelerate that process—to help you lessen your panic, adapt faster, define the new normal, and thrive going forward. And it arrives as we all, in some way, have felt a shift in our lives.
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Jason tells great stories in his own voice
- By Bryan Eisenberg on 03-04-23
By: Jason Feifer
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Finish Line
- Dispelling Fear, Finding Peace, and Preparing for the End of Your Life
- By: Robert Wolgemuth, Joni Eareckson Tada - foreword
- Narrated by: Robert Wolgemuth, Joni Eareckson Tada
- Length: 5 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Facing your ultimate death can be scary, but in light of God's promises, it doesn't have to be. Finish Line provides practical and biblical help on topics such as finances, blessing others, end-of-life choices, heaven, and caring for those you leave behind so you can approach your own finish line with hope, joy, and peace.
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Great book, so pertinent
- By Marvin Eastlund, MD on 07-18-23
By: Robert Wolgemuth, and others
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Growing Up in Public
- Coming of Age in a Digital World
- By: Devorah Heitner
- Narrated by: Devorah Heitner
- Length: 8 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Between social media, constant connection, and addictive tech and smartphones, the boundaries of privacy are stretched thin. We can track our kids’ every move with apps, see their grades within minutes of being posted, and fixate on their digital footprint, anxious that a misstep could cause them to be “canceled” or even jeopardize their admission to college. All of this adds pressure on kids, particularly Gen Z. Growing Up in Public shows us that by focusing on character, rather than the threat of getting caught or exposed, we can support our kids to be authentically themselves.
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Must Read for Every Parent Today
- By luckiest on 12-18-23
By: Devorah Heitner
Fascinating!!
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The stories of the mothers and non-mothers. All great, valid prespectives.
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Necessary
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outstanding
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Eye opener
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Juicy topic
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It’s filled with reviews of “customers” of motherhood.
It’s not To Be or Not To Be
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I walk away with these thoughts ...
Motherhood is overtly and covertly pushed on many women.
Women are not permitted to talk about their feelings of regret after motherhood, or warned, in advance, about the unhappiness, discontent ... that defines motherhood for some.
This mechanism is perpetuated by society to preserve the social order which depends on women having children and serving families selflessly for free.
The answer?
Perhaps, in part, more truth about motherhood sooner, so women have a better understanding of what motherhood can cost, so women can make better choices before becoming pregnant.
More acceptance for child free women, so its a valid choice without penalty.
Much more support for mothers, division of labor with fathers and such.
End goal - More happy, content women. More equitable society. More deeply desired and wanted children.
Tough but meaningful
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Well communicated
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Very needed
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