
If He's So Great, Why Do I Feel So Bad?
Recognizing and Overcoming Subtle Abuse
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Narrated by:
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Virginia Wolf
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By:
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Avery Neal
About this listen
Are you a victim of subtle abuse?
Are you always the one apologizing? Constantly questioning and blaming yourself? Do you often feel confused, frustrated, and angry? Aware that something isn't right about your relationship, but can't put your finger on what it is?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, you're not alone. Nearly half of all women - and men - in the United States experience psychological abuse without realizing it. Manipulation, deception, and disrespect leave no physical scars, but they can be just as traumatic as physical abuse. In this groundbreaking audiobook, Avery Neal, founder of the Women's Therapy Clinic, helps you recognize the warning signs of subtle abuse. As you are able to identify patterns that have never made sense before, you are better equipped to make changes.
An expert in the field, Neal has guided countless individuals to regain their self-esteem, their joy, and their lives. From letting go of fear to setting boundaries, whether you're gathering the courage to finally leave or learning how to guard against a chronically abusive pattern, If He's So Great, Why Do I Feel So Bad? will help you enjoy a happy, healthy, fulfilling life, free of shame or blame.
©2018 Avery Jordan Neal (P)2018 TantorListeners also enjoyed...
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Identifying covert emotional manipulation is tricky. You sense something is wrong, but you can't quite put your finger on the problem. This powerful book will reveal to you if manipulation is at play in your relationships. It will open your eyes. You will learn 30 tactics manipulators use to get what they want. You will also learn to spot the warning signs within yourself that expose covert manipulation is taking place, even if you can't identify the specific tactics being used.
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This book can change your life!
- By Cat O. on 04-04-18
By: Adelyn Birch
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Healing from Hidden Abuse
- A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse
- By: Shannon Thomas LCSW
- Narrated by: Wendy Tremont King
- Length: 6 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Within every community, toxic people can be found hiding in families, couples, companies, and places of worship. The cryptic nature of psychological abuse involves repetitious mind games played by one individual or a group of people. Psychological abuse leaves no bruises. There are no broken bones. There are no holes in the walls. The bruises, brokenness, and holes are held tightly within the target of the abuse.
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Proceed with caution
- By Kamel on 10-17-18
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The Gaslight Effect
- How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your Life
- By: Dr. Robin Stern
- Narrated by: Nan McNamara
- Length: 9 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Gaslighting is an insidious form of emotional abuse and manipulation that is difficult to recognize and even harder to break free from. That’s because it plays into one of our worst fears — of being abandoned — and many of our deepest needs: to be understood, appreciated, and loved. In this groundbreaking guide, the prominent therapist Dr. Robin Stern shows how the Gaslight Effect works and tells you how to turn up your Gaslight Radar, so you know when a relationship is headed for trouble.
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Political stuff... really?
- By K on 03-28-18
By: Dr. Robin Stern
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Out of the Fog
- Moving from Confusion to Clarity After Narcissistic Abuse
- By: Dana Morningstar
- Narrated by: Dana Morningstar
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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The FOG is an acronym that stands for "Fear, Obligation, and Guilt". These three emotions are often how narcissists, sociopaths, and other types of emotional manipulators go about controlling others.
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THE best book I’ve ever read on the subject
- By Alexandria Filipowski on 10-23-19
By: Dana Morningstar
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Ghosted and Breadcrumbed
- Stop Falling for Unavailable Men and Get Smart About Healthy Relationships
- By: Dr. Marni Feuerman
- Narrated by: Devon Sorvari
- Length: 6 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Time and again, some women fall for someone who for one reason or another will never return their feelings. The object of their affection may be emotionally unavailable, married, or even pathologically cruel. The woman who routinely finds herself in this situation suffers mightily, feeling rejected, unloved, undesirable. With empathy and compassion, Dr. Marni Feuerman helps women see their situations clearly, understand the historical, emotional, and psychological reasons behind their actions, and most importantly, make better choices for themselves.
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For Woman who have affairs w/Married Men
- By Sassylady on 08-03-21
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The Emotionally Abusive Relationship
- How to Stop Being Abused and How to Stop Abusing
- By: Beverly Engel
- Narrated by: Deanna Hurst
- Length: 10 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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The number of people who become involved with partners who abuse them emotionally and/or who are emotionally abusive themselves is phenomenal, and yet emotional abuse is the least understood form of abuse. In this breakthrough book, Beverly Engel, one of the world's leading experts on the subject, shows us what emotional abuse is and what to do about it.
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Amazing SELF GROWTH
- By Tina Payne on 12-10-20
By: Beverly Engel
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Narcissistic Ex
- How to Get Over a Toxic Relationship, Deal With an Abusive Ex and Become Free of the Controlling Sociopath
- By: Lauren Kozlowski
- Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
- Length: 2 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Narcissistic abuse is a form of abuse that ensures victims are left emotionally drained, mentally exhausted, and devoid of any self-worth or self-esteem...ending a relationship with a narcissist isn’t that easy. In this audiobook, I want to offer you some guidance on this rarely-talked about aspect of an abusive relationship: how to deal with a narcissist when they’re your ex.
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thank you so much!!
- By jeff gipson on 12-30-19
By: Lauren Kozlowski
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Trauma Bonding: Understanding and Overcoming the Trauma Bond in a Narcissistic Relationship
- Narcissistic Relationship Recovery, Book 1
- By: Lauren Kozlowski
- Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
- Length: 1 hr and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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If you're constantly feeling on edge, forever working to appease your spouse to little avail and feel like you're constantly being chipped away at with their abusive behavior, then I can understand how emotionally shattering it feels to live this way. If, in the same breath, it breaks your heart to even consider leaving them because you can't imagine life without them, then I can understand that feeling too - because I was trauma bonded to my abusive ex.
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Not relevant for everyone dealing with trauma bonding
- By Alesia Braund on 11-18-20
By: Lauren Kozlowski
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The Emotionally Destructive Marriage
- How to Find Your Voice and Reclaim Your Hope
- By: Leslie Vernick
- Narrated by: Leslie Vernick
- Length: 6 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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You can't put it into words, but something is happening to you. Your stomach churns, your heart aches, and the tension in your marriage is making you feel weary and a little crazy. The constant criticism, disrespect, cruelty, deceit, and gross indifference are eroding your confidence and breaking your spirit. For any woman caught in an emotionally destructive marriage, Leslie Vernick offers a personalized path forward.
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I wish this book had been written 10 years ago
- By D. C. Hoult on 09-08-14
By: Leslie Vernick
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Why Can't I Just Leave
- A Guide to Waking Up and Walking Out of a Pathological Love Relationship
- By: Kristen Milstead PhD, Sandra L. Brown - foreword
- Narrated by: Sheri Saginor
- Length: 10 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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More than 60 million people have been in a pathological love relationship with someone who has an impaired conscience. Using the stories of survivors and social psychological research on compliance, cognitive dissonance, and thought control, Why Can't I Just Leave? explains how relationships with pathological partners can create impossible dilemmas that trap you in a distorted dream state and hijack your thoughts and emotions. Learn what those who are conscience-impaired don't want you to know and find out how to wake up and walk out of your partner's invisible prison forever.
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Finally
- By Amazon Customer on 10-01-22
By: Kristen Milstead PhD, and others
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When Loving Him Is Hurting You
- Hope and Help for Women Dealing with Narcissism and Emotional Abuse
- By: Dr. David Hawkins
- Narrated by: Jim Denison
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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You fell in love with him. But over time you've come to realize he's in love with himself - and you feel trapped. His needs, his problems, and his plans always seem to take precedence over yours. Dr. David Hawkins, director of the Marriage Recovery Center, offers a guide to help you identify signs of narcissism, understand how your loved one's issues are affecting you, and prepare a biblical game plan for freeing yourself to live courageously in light of God's love.
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The book I so desperately needed to read
- By Julia on 05-26-18
What listeners say about If He's So Great, Why Do I Feel So Bad?
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Primetime
- 11-28-23
Absolutely What I Needed!
This book is exactly everything I needed to hear, learn, and know. Wow! It is as though the author wrote my life story. I have read countless books on abusive relationship and self help. This book is by far one of the best! I am so grateful for the hard truth on how awful I have allowed myself to be treated in my marriage. No more! I deserve better! Ms Avery, I can't thank you enough!!! This book is a gift to all women and I HIGHLY recommend it. I came across this book at the right time. Every woman should read it!
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- Coco
- 10-21-23
28 year old male just out of a engagement.
loved it. should be recommended and put in a form for kids and teenagers to read, should be apart of graduating high-school. I think this book not only helps people notice abuse but it can show them how this world and economy works and can translate what this book says into a masterclass for young people.
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- Leah Brake
- 12-17-20
informative
helped me put things into perspective, very insightful in my opinion, very good listen to.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Erica Butler
- 06-25-24
I plan to listen to this again!
Author shared relatable stories which gives the reader/listener a visual of what “ subtle abuse” looks like in various situations. I also enjoyed the journal prompt and the mindfulness thinking.
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Overall
- Kyleena
- 06-01-20
Desperate to be loved
This is probably one of my favorite books that truly details the nature of an abusive relationship. Themes like core wounds, the inner child are among some of the useful things discussed. The book really opened my eyes to the fact that one's desperation to be loved can become more important to a person than their being abused. I learned a lot about my own psychology reading this book. Towards the end of the book, there is advice for mothers to give daughters to help them recognize red flags early on rather than later on. That was also very helpful! A solid book from start to finish.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Karen Harris
- 03-12-24
Concepts presented well, but…
I thought it was well written and presented. Although, by the title, I thought there would be more focus on the subtleties of manipulation in abusive relationships. There was much mention of more overt, abusive tactics. The biggest oversight was leaving out a chapter on raising sons. It is understood how to train daughters to avoid such relationships is important. But what about protecting our sons from predators and also how does being in the family dynamic as a son affect their future relationships with women? Definitely a missed opportunity.
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- Laureen K
- 09-18-20
Please keep politics out of a Self Help book.
I was really looking forward to listening to this book. However, when in the forward digs were made at certain political figures I decided it was not for me. I would like to listen to the message without politics being interjected.
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7 people found this helpful