𝐌𝐞𝐧 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐦.

We're taught to "man up" and handle everything alone.

When we struggle, we don't reach out. When friends share problems, we jump straight to solutions.

We think asking for help is weakness. We think giving advice is helping.

But here's what we miss: We never build emotional safety nets.

Women often do this instinctively. They listen first. They create space. They support before they solve.

The result? Deeper friendships. Stronger teams. And, as research shows, better leadership outcomes.

The best male leaders I know have learned this. They know that sometimes, people don't need your solution. They just need to feel understood.

Men: Try this. Next time someone shares a challenge, don't jump to advice. Ask: "How did that feel?" or "Tell me more."

It's time to redefine masculinity.

🎙️ I explore this with Andrew Reiner in the latest How to Live episode. Andrew wrote the bestselling Better Boys, Better Men and writes on masculinity for The New York Times. We discuss male friendships, emotional support, and why redefining strength might unlock better leadership and deeper relationships.

Shownotes

https://howtolive.life/episode/097-redefining-masculinity-with-andrew-reiner

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Be interested, not interesting.

𝐈𝐧 𝐧𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐱𝐡𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠. 𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠.

Most high performers approach networking like a performance.

Say something clever. Be impressive. Stand out.

But being interesting takes energy. It puts pressure on you.

And it often keeps things at the surface.

There's a better way: Be interested instead.

Ask thoughtful questions. Listen deeply.

Let others do what they love most - talk about themselves.

It's lighter. It's more human.

And it builds real trust. The kind that leads to long-term relationships, not short-term transactions.

🎙️ This shift from performing to connecting is exactly what Ryan Lim, and I dive into in the latest How to Live episode. Ryan's the bestselling author of The Business of Networking, No 1 on Strait Times, and he shares why introverts often make the best networkers, and why curiosity is your greatest tool.

Buy Ryan's Book here - https://singapore.kinokuniya.com/bw/9789819423323

Get the first chapter free - https://bit.ly/BizNetworkChp1

Shownotes

https://howtolive.life/episode/096-networking-that-actually-feels-good-with-ryan-lim

How to Live Newsletter
Go deeper with articles every 2-3 weeks. No spam.
https://sharadlal.substack.com/

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Most people stay stuck because they’re waiting for clarity.
Big mistake.

When you’re 15–20 years into your career, the destination will never be what you imagined anyway.

What’s really keeping you stuck isn’t a lack of direction. It’s fear.
Fear disguised as “being strategic.”
Fear disguised as “waiting for the right moment.”
Fear disguised as “needing more information.”

But here’s the thing:
You don’t overcome fear by thinking your way through it.
You overcome it by moving through it.

The path doesn’t appear before you move.
It reveals itself because you moved.

Start small: One conversation. One experiment. One step forward.

Your next chapter is waiting on the other side of action, not analysis.

🎙️ In the latest How to Live podcast, I’m sharing part of my conversation with the amazing Michelle on her Upward Spiral podcast.

We talk about practical ways to find purpose, how to move when stuck, and why your 40s might be the best time to reinvent yourself.

Shownotes

https://howtolive.life/episode/095-how-to-move-when-youre-stuck-a-conversation-with-sharad-lal

Check Michelle's Podcast

https://open.spotify.com/show/4CNdVdUDHoWQ50oZmWKQ6R

How to Live Newsletter
Go deeper with articles every 2-3 weeks. No spam.
https://sharadlal.substack.com/

Leave us a message
https://howtolive.life/contact

About Sharad Lal
https://www.sharadlal.net/

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