
Under Pressure
Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls
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Narrated by:
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Lisa Damour Ph.D.
About this listen
New York Times best seller
An urgently needed guide to the alarming increase in anxiety and stress experienced by girls from elementary school through college, from the author of Untangled
“An invaluable read for anyone who has girls, works with girls, or cares about girls - for everyone!” (Claire Shipman, author of The Confidence Code and The Confidence Code for Girls)
Though anxiety has risen among young people overall, studies confirm that it has skyrocketed in girls. Research finds that the number of girls who said that they often felt nervous, worried, or fearful jumped 55 percent from 2009 to 2014, while the comparable number for adolescent boys has remained unchanged. As a clinical psychologist who specializes in working with girls, Lisa Damour, PhD, has witnessed this rising tide of stress and anxiety in her own research, in private practice, and in the all-girls’ school where she consults. She knew this had to be the topic of her new book.
In the engaging, anecdotal style and reassuring tone that won over thousands of fans of her first book, Untangled, Damour starts by addressing the facts about psychological pressure. She explains the surprising and underappreciated value of stress and anxiety: that stress can helpfully stretch us beyond our comfort zones, and anxiety can play a key role in keeping girls safe. When we emphasize the benefits of stress and anxiety, we can help our daughters take them in stride.
But no parents want their daughter to suffer from emotional overload, so Damour then turns to the many facets of girls’ lives where tension takes hold: their interactions at home, pressures at school, social anxiety among other girls and among boys, and their lives online. As listeners move through the layers of girls’ lives, they’ll learn about the critical steps that adults can take to shield their daughters from the toxic pressures to which our culture - including we, as parents - subjects girls.
Listeners who know Damour from Untangled or the New York Times, or from her regular appearances on CBS News, will be drawn to this important new contribution to understanding and supporting today’s girls.
Praise for Under Pressure
“Truly a must-read for parents, teachers, coaches, and mentors wanting to help girls along the path to adulthood.” (Julie Lythcott-Haims, New York Times best-selling author of How to Raise an Adult)
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Critic reviews
“Lisa Damour offers a fresh, riveting take on the unsustainable stress girls face today, which is often fueled unintentionally by the most well-meaning parents and teachers. Damour also offers refreshing and research-based practical fixes; it’s possible to normalize pressure, in many cases, and use it in fortifying ways to build strength and confidence. Under Pressure is an invaluable read for anyone who has girls, works with girls, or cares about girls - for everyone!” (Claire Shipman, New York Times best-selling author of The Confidence Code and The Confidence Code for Girls)
“Anyone who has read the beloved Untangled knows that Lisa Damour gets girls. This timely sequel brings stunning clarity to the complicated set of stressors that girls experience - in the classroom, online, with peers, and at home - and models how to show up as an ally instead of an adversary. Truly a must-read for parents, teachers, coaches, and mentors wanting to help girls along the path to adulthood.” (Julie Lythcott-Haims, New York Times best-selling author of How to Raise an Adult)
“Under Pressure is exactly what parents need and, as a mother, it helped me to relax! Damour explains the difference between healthy and unhealthy stress and anxiety. She offers a detailed, comprehensive look at how to help our daughters manage naturally occurring tension, toxic stress, and anxiety. This brilliant book is a must-read.” (Norah O’Donnell, host, CBS This Morning)
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Story
During her multi-book investigation into understanding human nature, Gretchen Rubin realized that by asking the seemingly dry question “How do I respond to expectations?” we gain explosive self-knowledge. She discovered that based on their answer, people fit into Four Tendencies: Upholders, Questioners, Obligers, and Rebels. Our Tendency shapes every aspect of our behavior, so using this framework allows us to make better decisions, meet deadlines, suffer less stress, and engage more effectively.
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Terrible, Repetitive, and Filled with Bad Advice
- By T. Hadnot on 03-08-18
By: Gretchen Rubin
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Brain Wash
- Detox Your Mind for Clearer Thinking, Deeper Relationships, and Lasting Happiness
- By: David Perlmutter MD, Austin Perlmutter MD, Kristin Loberg
- Narrated by: Peter Ganim
- Length: 7 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Contemporary life provides us with infinite opportunities, along with endless temptations. We can eat whatever we want, whenever we want. We can buy goods and services for rapid delivery. But living in this 24/7 hyper-reality poses serious risks to our physical and mental states, our connections to others, and even to the world at large. Brain Wash builds from a simple premise: Our brains are being gravely manipulated, resulting in behaviors that leave us more lonely, anxious, depressed, distrustful, illness-prone, and overweight than ever before.
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Poor performance and poor writing.
- By Julie on 01-21-20
By: David Perlmutter MD, and others
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The Yes Brain
- How to Cultivate Courage, Curiosity, and Resilience in Your Child
- By: Daniel J. Siegel M.D., Tina Payne Bryson
- Narrated by: Daniel J. Siegel M.D., Tina Payne Bryson
- Length: 5 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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When facing contentious issues such as screen time, food choices, and bedtime, children often act out or shut down, responding with reactivity instead of receptivity. This is what New York Times best-selling authors Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson call a No Brain response. But our kids can be taught to approach life with openness and curiosity. When kids work from a Yes Brain, they’re more willing to take chances and explore. They’re more curious and imaginative. They’re better at relationships and handling adversity.
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Where is the PDF
- By Erin on 02-15-18
By: Daniel J. Siegel M.D., and others
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Resilient
- How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness
- By: Rick Hanson, Forrest Hanson
- Narrated by: Rick Hanson
- Length: 8 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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With his trademark blend of neuroscience, mindfulness, and positive psychology, New York Times best-selling author Dr. Rick Hanson shows you how to develop 12 vital inner strengths hardwired into your own nervous system. Then no matter what life throws at you, you’ll be able to feel less stressed, pursue opportunities with confidence, and stay calm and centered in the face of adversity. This practical guide is full of concrete suggestions, experiential practices, personal examples, and insights into the brain.
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This is Rick Hanson's BEST book yet!
- By Lyle Walter on 03-30-18
By: Rick Hanson, and others
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Our Mothers, Ourselves
- How Understanding Your Mother's Influence Can Set You on a Path to a Better Life
- By: Henry Cloud, John Townsend
- Narrated by: Tom Parks
- Length: 9 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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In Our Mothers, Ourselves, Henry Cloud and John Townsend show how understanding how our mothers have profoundly influenced our lives can set us on a path toward wholeness and growth. No one has influenced the person you are today like your mother. The way she handled your needs as a child has shaped your worldview, your relationships, your marriage, your career, your self-image - your life. Our Mothers, Ourselves can help you identify areas that need reshaping, to make positive choices for personal change, and to establish a mature relationship with Mom today.
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NOW I UNDERSTAND
- By Pam H. on 10-30-21
By: Henry Cloud, and others
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The Scaffold Effect
- Raising Resilient, Self-Reliant, and Secure Kids in an Age of Anxiety
- By: Harold S. Koplewicz
- Narrated by: Harold S. Koplewicz
- Length: 8 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Just as sturdy scaffolding is necessary when erecting a building and will come down when the structure grows stable, good parenting provides children with steady and warm emotional nourishment on the path toward independence. Never-ending parental problem-solving and involvement can have the opposite effect, enabling fragility and anxiety over time.
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Disappointed
- By Jaimie Sauer on 08-04-21
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Transcend
- The New Science of Self-Actualization
- By: Scott Barry Kaufman PhD
- Narrated by: Scott Barry Kaufman PhD
- Length: 10 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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When psychologist Scott Barry Kaufman first discovered Maslow's unfinished theory of transcendence, sprinkled throughout a cache of unpublished journals, lectures, and essays, he felt a deep resonance with his own work and life. In this groundbreaking book, Kaufman picks up where Maslow left off, unraveling the mysteries of his unfinished theory, and integrating these ideas with the latest research on attachment, connection, creativity, love, purpose and other building blocks of a life well lived.
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Exactly what I wanted, and needed
- By Shannon Tripp on 06-24-20
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Decoding Boys
- New Science Behind the Subtle Art of Raising Sons
- By: Cara Natterson
- Narrated by: Cara Natterson
- Length: 8 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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As pediatrician and mother of two teenagers Cara Natterson explains, puberty starts in boys long before any visible signs appear, and that causes confusion about their changing temperaments for boys and parents alike. Often, they also grow quieter as they grow taller, which leads to less parent-child communication. But, as Natterson warns in Decoding Boys, we respect their increasing "need" for privacy, monosyllabic conversations, and alone time at their peril.
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wanted to give 5 but last chapter is so biased
- By Jeff Bullock on 01-15-22
By: Cara Natterson
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You Can Fix Your Brain
- Just 1 Hour a Week to the Best Memory, Productivity, and Sleep You've Ever Had
- By: Tom O'Bryan, Mark Hyman
- Narrated by: Tom O'Bryan
- Length: 11 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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We've all experienced brain fog - misplaced keys, forgotten facts, a general feeling that you're just feeling off today. And many of us will experience that "fog" manifesting as something more permanent - either in ourselves or our loved ones. No matter what your current brain health state may be, You Can Fix Your Brain will enable and empower you to take concrete steps that will make an immediate difference in your brain’s vitality, clarity, and energy. Your memory will improve, fogginess will disappear, you’ll be less tired all the time, and much more.
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Repetitive until the last three chapters.
- By Toni on 10-20-18
By: Tom O'Bryan, and others
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Emotional Agility
- Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life
- By: Susan David
- Narrated by: Susan David
- Length: 9 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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The path to personal and professional fulfillment is rarely straight. Ask anyone who has achieved his or her biggest goals or whose relationships thrive, and you'll hear stories of many unexpected detours along the way. What separates those who master these challenges and those who get derailed? The answer is agility - emotional agility.
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Slow, Simple, and Easy to Comprehend
- By Jules on 04-21-20
By: Susan David
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Better Than Before
- Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives
- By: Gretchen Rubin
- Narrated by: Gretchen Rubin
- Length: 9 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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The author of the blockbuster New York Times best sellers The Happiness Project and Happier at Home tackles the critical question: How do we change? Gretchen Rubin's answer: through habits. Habits are the invisible architecture of everyday life. It takes work to make a habit, but once that habit is set, we can harness the energy of habits to build happier, stronger, more productive lives.
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Don't Waste Your Money
- By Stacie M on 04-23-15
By: Gretchen Rubin
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EMDR
- The Breakthrough Therapy for Overcoming Anxiety, Stress, and Trauma
- By: Francine Shapiro, Margot Silk Forrest
- Narrated by: Jennywren Walker
- Length: 12 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Hailed as the most important method to emerge in psychotherapy in decades, EMDR has successfully treated psychological problems and illnesses in more than one million sufferers worldwide, with a rapidity that defies belief. In a new introduction, Shapiro presents the new applications of this remarkable therapy and the latest scientific research that demonstrates its efficacy.
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“Real” Stories about the Magic of EMDR
- By Joe on 06-16-20
By: Francine Shapiro, and others
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Let Your Light Shine
- How Mindfulness Can Empower Children and Rebuild Communities
- By: Ali Smith, Atman Smith, Andres Gonzalez, and others
- Narrated by: Ali Smith, Atman Smith, Andres Gonzalez, and others
- Length: 9 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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In this inspiring book, founders of The Holistic Life Foundation Ali Smith, Atman Smith, and Andres Gonzalez describe how they have spent the past twenty years teaching yoga, meditation, and breathwork to thousands of at-risk kids in Baltimore schools helping them to develop deep reserves of patience, empathy, resolve, and—when needed—the righteous anger that fuels deep structural change. Their work has received wide national attention due to their remarkable results.
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Title is misleading
- By Lacy on 12-20-24
By: Ali Smith, and others
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Side Hustle
- From Idea to Income in 27 Days
- By: Chris Guillebeau
- Narrated by: Chris Guillebeau
- Length: 4 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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For some people, the thought of quitting their day job to pursue the entrepreneurial life is exhilarating. For many others, it's terrifying. After all, a stable job that delivers a regular paycheck is a blessing. And not everyone has the means or the desire to take on the risks and responsibilities of working for themselves. But what if we could quickly and easily create an additional stream of income without giving up the security of a full-time job? Enter the side hustle.
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Just $100 Startup" distilled - At Double speed.
- By Daniel L on 09-25-17
By: Chris Guillebeau
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Why Didn't You Tell Me?
- A Memoir
- By: Carmen Rita Wong
- Narrated by: Carmen Rita Wong
- Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Carmen Rita Wong has always craved a sense of belonging: First as a toddler in a warm room full of Black and brown Latina women, like her mother, Lupe, cheering her dancing during her childhood in Harlem. And in Chinatown, where her immigrant father, “Papi” Wong, a hustler, would show her and her older brother off in opulent restaurants decorated in red and gold. Then came the almost exclusively white playgrounds of New Hampshire after her mother married her stepfather, Marty, who seemed to be the ideal of the white American dad.
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Why didn’t they tell me this was such a negative listen?
- By laurie on 09-24-22
By: Carmen Rita Wong
What listeners say about Under Pressure
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- Kim
- 09-24-19
A Must Read!
Lisa,
Thank you for the evidence-based, real world techniques to help us teach our girls how to listen, use and tame their everyday anxieties! Brilliant!
Kim Fuller Jacoby
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1 person found this helpful
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- Laura Bonnett
- 08-06-21
As pertinent during COVID as ever!
Lisa Damour has such a great way of making complex topics manageable. I loved listening to this and hearing her calming voice made it so enjoyable! A must-read for parents of girls and boys, before the teen years!
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- RJensen
- 06-19-19
Excellent advice for Mother’s if daughters
I loved this book so much!!!
It helped me understand my daughter and how to communicate with her better!
The author is amazing and she narrates the book perfectly!
Highly recommend!
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- Amanda M.
- 06-21-23
Understanding teen melt-downs
Identifying the stressors and how to communicate and teach life lessons in the midst of teen storms- a must read/listen to book, full of expert advice. Highly recommend.
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- Amazon User
- 10-13-24
Very helpful
Great advice and practical applications for a parent with a pre-teen or teen daughter.
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- Amy
- 09-14-22
Just what I needed!
As the mother of four girl, I’m only sorry I did t gave this book sooner! I loved every word! I’m really hoping there will be another book as a follow up that speaks to life for girls after Covid and how we can cope and help our girls cope with increasing anxiety as world conditions continue to worsen!
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1 person found this helpful
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- jeromy
- 01-22-20
Incredibly Insightful
I will be referring to this book for advice for years to come. Full of grounding and eye opening insight this book is full of wonderful advice to help girls navigate their way through school, social lives and family.
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- Albina Taggart
- 07-10-21
Amazing must listen/read
Helpful insights to any parents blind spots!
She uses easy to understand language for the listener. The listener can choose to use these easy mottos and methods to convey healthy conversations in life and at home
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- Darren
- 07-02-19
Have to read book for those working with girls
I loved this book. There were so many wonderful examples and ideas to use with the girls I love and the girls I work with. I would definitely recommend this book to both parents and clinicians.
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- DLR
- 04-12-25
Lectura obligatoria para quienes tienen hijas.
Lectura obligatoria para padres. Y ojalá lo puedan hacer antes de middle school. La autora da muchos tips que se pueden usar para ayudar a nuestras hijas.
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