The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control Audiobook By Katherine Morgan Schafler cover art

The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control

A Path to Peace and Power

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The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control

By: Katherine Morgan Schafler
Narrated by: Katherine Morgan Schafler
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About this listen

Selected for USA Today's Best Books of 2023

Selected as Editor's Pick in Amazon's Best Books of 2023

From psychotherapist Katherine Morgan Schafler, an invitation to every “recovering perfectionist” to challenge the way they look at perfectionism, and the way they look at themselves.

We’ve been looking at perfectionism all wrong. As psychotherapist and former on-site therapist at Google Katherine Morgan Schafler argues in The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control, you don’t have to stop being a perfectionist to be healthy. For women who are sick of being given the generic advice to “find balance,” a new approach has arrived.

Which of the five types of perfectionist are you? Classic, intense, Parisian, messy, or procrastinator? As you identify your unique perfectionist profile, you'll learn how to manage each form of perfectionism to work for you, not against you. Beyond managing it, you'll learn how to embrace and even enjoy your perfectionism. Yes, enjoy!

Full of stories and brimming with humor, empathy, and depth, this book is a love letter to the ambitious, high achieving, full-of-life clients who filled the author’s private practice, and who changed her life. It’s a clarion call for all women to dare to want more without feeling greedy or ungrateful. Ultimately, this book will show you how to make the single greatest trade you’ll ever make in your life, which is to exchange superficial control for real power.

©2023 Katherine Morgan Schafler (P)2023 Penguin Audio
Career Success Personal Development Personal Success Psychology Psychology & Mental Health Inspiring Thought-Provoking Career Mental Health
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Critic reviews

“From an emerging thought leader, an irresistible invitation to reclaim your natural state of wholeness, your joy and your life."—Deepak Chopra, New York Times bestselling author of Abundance

"A valuable, much-needed perspective that gives you permission to be more in a world that's telling you to be less.”—Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone

"An accessible, actionable guide for how to aim high without overthinking or punishing yourself along the way. This book is a must-read for anxious achievers who want to remain ambitious but could operate with a bit more self-compassion."—Liz Fosslien, coauthor and illustrator of the bestselling books Big Feelings and No Hard Feelings

What listeners say about The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control

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Loved it!

As a perfectionist I really like the approach of accepting your perfectionism and working around it so it’s beneficial for you. I always hear comments about how you shouldn’t aim for perfection but those kind of comments don’t help because they feel like going against your essence. Katherine’s approach is amazing. Really enjoyed it!

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2 people found this helpful

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Best book I’ve read in a decade

Bookmark after bookmark. A staple read for being a better human. Especially if you’re a perfectionist! 🎯

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Fantastic book

This was a fabulous book that will benefit so many women. I love her light hearted and funny approach.

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Important guide to understand motivation/behavior

I rarely comment on the books I listen to, but this book is so good that I wanted to share a few words about it. I love this book. The stories keep the listener interested, and everything is backed by research, and support for the content is mentioned throughout the book. This not about "the authors experience" as one other reviewer mentioned, rather there are stories of many peoples' experiences, then an explanation, and the research support or reference to other experts' work. The organization of content is superb. The author is an exceptional narrator; very easy to listen to. I found out that I am exactly as I have known for years; I am a messy perfectionist. The book has helped me find some self-compassion and find ways to use this knowledge to positively adapt behavior change. The only thing I wished for while listening was that much of the great content would help others who do not identify as a perfectionist and therefore might be turned off by the title. I hope there is another book in the works.

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Beautiful

I loved every min of it. I’m a therapist myself and sometimes hearing these words repeated back to me is a reminder to don’t forget about yourself in all the chaos. It helped me map my understanding of my own life in small bits. I would highly recommend this book. I have gifted the book to a few people so far.

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Almost perfect, except the exclusionist gender generalizations.

About 90% relatable to any sex, 5% specific to women, & 5% sweeping generalizations about how this couldn’t apply to men, who are “always/never” X & then strawmanning that all males are like some highly lauded media personalities is highly insulting & triggering. I appreciated the inclusive introduction to women & anyone who identified as a woman. As a “beta” male who grew up in a household of women, & having a perfectionist mother, wife & daughter I can appreciate that they have a much harder time of it.
Ex. That dads can’t feel the equivalent of mom guilt, or any of the quandaries of trying to be it all, etc. is pure bunk. The rhythm of enjoying the book & garnering all one can to self-understand was frequently disrupted by a tirade of exclusionist & inaccurate stereotyping. It took a moment after each incident to pause, recenter, & recall she was only speaking from her experience, rather than objectively, but I get there’s a general perception.

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So good!

I’m am SO GRATEFUL for this book! It’s allowed me to reflect on so many personality quirks as well as some of my unseen/unconscious tendencies. It’s just so real and relatable for me; not to mention it’s beautifully written. Highly recommend!

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So good. So helpful.

I loved it so much I had to buy the hard copy half way through to be able to highlight and underline. I plan to listen again through to make sure I didn’t kids anything and I probably will many times after that. So. Good.

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The extremely valuable toolkit for mental health

Every human should read this book. At first It was clear this book was made for Woman, but the information was so authentic, educated and valuable, I had to keep reading. I started with the physical copy, but decided to leave it at home so my wife could have easier access to it and I downloaded this audio book so she could access the physical copy at her leisure.

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Fantastic

This book is Incredible. So many parts of it drove me to reflect and learn about myself and how I may be perceived by others, intentionally or otherwise.

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