
Mary Brown is leaving town
Fun and laughter at weight loss camp & the joys of internet dating
Failed to add items
Sorry, we are unable to add the item because your shopping cart is already at capacity.
Add to Cart failed.
Please try again later
Add to Wish List failed.
Please try again later
Remove from wishlist failed.
Please try again later
Adding to library failed
Please try again
Follow podcast failed
Please try again
Unfollow podcast failed
Please try again
Access a growing selection of included Audible Originals, audiobooks, and podcasts.
You will get an email reminder before your trial ends.
Audible Plus auto-renews for $7.95/mo after 30 days. Upgrade or cancel anytime.
Buy for $3.99
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
Pay using card ending in
By confirming your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions of Use and Amazon's Privacy Notice. Taxes where applicable.
-
Narrated by:
-
Virtual Voice
-
By:
-
Bernice Bloom

This title uses virtual voice narration
Virtual voice is computer-generated narration for audiobooks.
About this listen
FROM MILLION-SELLING WRITER BERNICE BLOOM A FABULOUSLY FUNNY TALE ABOUT WEIGHT LOSS CAMPS AND THE HORRORS OF INTERNET DATING.
'I just loved it.'
A wonderful book.'
“It was hysterical, some bits made me laugh out loud, and other parts made me blush with recognition.”
"This is definitely one of my favourite of Mary’s adventures so far! I feel like they’re just getting better and better! Can’t wait for the next one!!"
Mary Brown heads to Portugal for a weight loss camp and discovers it’s nothing like she expected.
Mary wants to hide from the instructors and cheat the system. The trouble is, her mum is with her and won’t leave her alone for a second… Then there's the angry instructor with a deep, dark secret about why he left the army. The mysterious woman who sneaks into their pool and does synchronised swimming every night. Who the hell is she? Why's she in their pool?
Mary obviously takes snacks in with her. Will they prevent her from losing any weight at all? And what about Yvonne - the slim, attractive lady who sneaks off every night after dinner? Where's she going? And what unearthly difficulties will Mary get herself into when she decides to follow her to find out...
While Mary's away on her retreat, she and Ted are forced to rethink their relationship. Ted doesn't have the time to see Mary because he's working all the time, and Mary is getting very fed up with the situation. Reluctantly, our lovely couple decide to go their separate ways, leaving Mary alone.
She decides to try online dating sites.
Aided and abetted by her friends, including Juan Pedro – the flamboyant Spaniard whom she met when he was a dancer in sparkly trousers on a cruise ship, and best friend Charlie, Mary heads out on NINE DATES IN NINE DAYS.
She meets an interesting collection of men, including those she nicknames: Usain Bolt, Harry the Hoarder, and Dead-Wife-Darren.
Then just when she thinks things can't get any worse, Juan organises a huge, entirely inadvisable party at the end.
It’s internet dating like you’ve never known it before…
"So incredibly funny. Read this book before you go on any internet dates."
"I loved it. If you join an online dating site and go on dates, then make sure the guy doesn't have a big bag with him or a young kid. This really made me laugh."
(IMPORTANT NOTE: THIS BOOK WAS PREVIOUSLY RELEASED AS ADORABLE FAT GIRL GOES ON A WEIGHT LOSS CAMP AND ADORABLE FAT GIRL GOES ONLINE DATING. IF YOU'VE READ THOSE, YOU'VE READ THIS!)!
adbl_web_global_use_to_activate_webcro768_stickypopup