Hey, how’s it going. My name is Chain, Chain Sawguy. As you might could guess, like any cool name it’s one I picked for myself. What’s wrong with my original name you might ask, well I don’t know what it was. You see I had a pretty normal childhood. I was a kid with no parents and a chainsaw that I could magically summon. I grew up in what you might could call the greek empire. How did I have a chainsaw years before it was ever invented you might ask? Just don’t poke holes and go along for the ride is what I say to you.

So, I didn’t take too kindly to greek monsters always attacking me, and that jerk Hercules always taking credit for my stuff. Seriously, the only thing that guy did was get and apple and wash some stables. Meanwhile I slay the monsters and he steals the credit. Anywho, I got myself a pet Hydra I named Fan Bro and the rest is pretty much the same as for anyone’s life.

I slayed some monsters, slayed some more monsters, and then teamed up with Ares the god of war for a while. He pays me to hunt down monsters here and there and doesn’t have to cover my battle health insurance thanks to my freelance work. That’s one thing you’ll learn about the gods, they’re as stingy as any other employer.

The rest is history. But, let’s not bore you with the details. For this story starts like all good stories, and that’s in the worst place of torture known to man. It’s called math class.

So, there I was, over 2000 years old and still stuck in freaking math class...