
Amateur
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Narrated by:
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Thomas Page McBee
About this listen
One of The Times UK’s Best Memoirs of 2018, BuzzFeed’s Best Nonfiction of 2018, Autostraddle’s Best LGBT Books of 2018, Book Riot’s Best Queer Books of 2018, and 52 Insight’s Favorite Nonfiction Books of 2018
From an award-winning writer whose work bristles with "hard-won strength, insight, agility, and love" (Maggie Nelson), an exquisite and troubling narrative of masculinity, violence, and society.
In this groundbreaking new book, the author, a trans man, trains to fight in a charity match at Madison Square Garden while struggling to untangle the vexed relationship between masculinity and violence. Through his experience boxing - learning to get hit and to hit back; wrestling with the camaraderie of the gym; confronting the betrayals and strength of his own body - McBee examines the weight of male violence, the pervasiveness of gender stereotypes, and the limitations of conventional masculinity. A wide-ranging exploration of gender in our society, Amateur is ultimately a story of hope, as McBee traces a new way forward, a new kind of masculinity, inside the ring and outside of it.
In this graceful, stunning, and uncompromising exploration of living, fighting, and healing, we gain insight into the stereotypes and shifting realities of masculinity today through the eyes of a new man.
©2018 Thomas Page McBee (P)2018 Simon & SchusterListeners also enjoyed...
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Featured Article: The Best Trans and Nonbinary Listens
As our society becomes more inclusive, some of our most underrepresented communities are getting a much-needed opportunity to tell their stories. For this list, we’ve come up with some of the best trans and nonbinary listens, across all genres and age categories. And because we know that authenticity is important to listeners, our selections are almost exclusively written by queer, trans, and nonbinary authors.

Editor's Pick
I have a (totally professional) crush on Thomas Page McBee
"Reason #1 I love this Audible book: it’s only 3.5 hours long. Reason #2 I love it: it’s freaking fabulous. I adore the feeling of accomplishment that comes with finishing a great listen in under two days! Thomas Page McBee is the first known trans man to have ever fought in the ring at Madison Square Garden. That alone would have made for a great memoir, but he doesn’t stop there. Amateur effortlessly explores gender stereotypes and male violence, and comes away with a hopeful vision for a new kind of masculinity."
—Rachel S., Audible Editor
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Story
With unflinching honesty and moving prose, Janet Mock relays her experiences of growing up young, multiracial, poor, and trans in America, offering listeners accessible language while imparting vital insight about the unique challenges and vulnerabilities of a marginalized and misunderstood population.
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A Wonderful Memoir
- By Jo on 01-24-16
By: Janet Mock
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Real Queer America
- LGBT Stories from Red States
- By: Samantha Allen
- Narrated by: Samantha Allen
- Length: 7 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In Real Queer America, Samantha Allen takes us on a cross-country road-trip stretching all the way from Provo, Utah to the Rio Grande Valley to the Bible Belt to the Deep South. Her motto for the trip: "Something gay every day." Making pit stops at drag shows, political rallies, and hubs of queer life across the heartland, she introduces us to scores of extraordinary LGBT people working for change, from the first openly transgender mayor in Texas history to the manager of the only queer night club in Bloomington, Indiana, and many more.
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Not what I expected
- By KiroPhoto on 04-09-19
By: Samantha Allen
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If I Was Your Girl
- By: Meredith Russo
- Narrated by: Samia Mounts
- Length: 7 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Amanda Hardy is the new girl in school. Like anyone else, all she wants is to make friends and fit in. But Amanda is keeping a secret, and she's determined not to get too close to anyone. But when she meets sweet, easygoing Grant, Amanda can't help but start to let him into her life. As they spend more time together, she realizes just how much she is losing by guarding her heart. She finds herself yearning to share with Grant everything about herself, including her past.
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The middle
- By Kirah on 06-02-16
By: Meredith Russo
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Felix Ever After
- By: Kacen Callender
- Narrated by: Logan Rozos
- Length: 8 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Felix Love has never been in love — and, yes, he’s painfully aware of the irony. He desperately wants to know what it’s like and why it seems so easy for everyone but him to find someone. What’s worse is that, even though he is proud of his identity, Felix also secretly fears that he’s one marginalization too many — Black, queer, and transgender — to ever get his own happily-ever-after.
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Easily my favourite book of the year so far
- By Anonymous User on 05-25-20
By: Kacen Callender
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Stay Gold
- By: Tobly McSmith
- Narrated by: Theo Germaine, Phoebe Strole
- Length: 9 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Pony plans to fly under the radar this year. Tired of getting too much attention at his old school after coming out as transgender, he’s hoping for a fresh start as a Hillcrest High senior. But it’s hard to live your best life with the threat of exposure lurking around every corner. Georgia is beginning to think there’s more to life than cheerleading. She just wants to keep a low profile until graduation...which is why she promised herself that dating is a nonstarter for the foreseeable future.
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Must Read
- By Khoula on 08-17-20
By: Tobly McSmith
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Tranny
- Confessions of Punk Rock's Most Infamous Anarchist Sellout
- By: Laura Jane Grace, Dan Ozzi
- Narrated by: Laura Jane Grace
- Length: 6 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
One of Billboard's 100 Greatest Music Books of All Time: The provocative transgender advocate and lead singer of the punk rock band Against Me! provides a searing account of her search for identity and her true self. It began in a bedroom in Naples, Florida, when a misbehaving punk teenager named Tom Gabel, armed with nothing but an acoustic guitar and a headful of anarchist politics, landed on a riff. Gabel formed Against Me! and rocketed the band from its scrappy beginnings-banging on a drum kit made of pickle buckets-to a major-label powerhouse.
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Powerful story and performance.
- By Beerarchy on 02-11-17
By: Laura Jane Grace, and others
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A Year Without a Name
- A Memoir
- By: Cyrus Grace Dunham
- Narrated by: Cyrus Grace Dunham
- Length: 4 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
For as long as they can remember, Cyrus Grace Dunham felt like a visitor in their own body. Their life was a series of imitations—lovable little girl, daughter, sister, young gay woman—until their profound sense of alienation became intolerable. Moving between Grace and Cyrus, Dunham brings us inside the chrysalis of gender transition, asking us to bear witness to an uncertain and exhilarating process that troubles our most basic assumptions about who we are and how we are constituted.
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A love story to yourself
- By Shelby Maden on 05-24-25
Beautiful
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Such a writer! Your willingness to delve into yourself and the way you used your words of telling, moved me to tears more than once.
This book is a must read for all who search for a better understanding of gender and transitions.
I thank you again.
A true reckoning!
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Memoir meets sociology- a great read!
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Wow. Stick to your ribs story telling.
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Best nonfiction book I have read in over a year!
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Loved it
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A coming of age story
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Excellent. Nuanced. Real.
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This book is more important than ever!
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Not as cohesive as I would have liked
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