Chris Thomas
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Chris Thomas

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Chris Thomas is an author specializing in self-help literature, particularly focusing on Rational Mindfulness—a framework he developed that integrates rational thinking, emotional intelligence, and mindfulness to enhance mental well-being and interpersonal relationships. 'In 1987, my fascination with psychology, philosophy, and self-improvement was sparked by a very unlikely source—a poker strategy book. The book focused on using clear thinking, logic, and rationality to win games. Intriguingly, it also delved into the subtle techniques some players use to gain an unfair advantage by exploiting their opponents’ irrationality. Although I’ve never played poker, the lessons I learned from that book extended far beyond the poker table. I became fascinated with applying these principles to all aspects of life. It first led me to start unmasking my own irrational thinking, resulting in a deeper understanding of myself and others. That early dive into rational thinking led me to move away from my Catholic upbringing and embrace Ayn Rand’s Objectivism—a philosophy all about reason, logic, and personal responsibility. It was controversial, sure, but I was young and all in. As a young, almost obsessive student of Objectivism, I was hooked on its focus on rational thought and evidence-based decision-making. It gave me a solid framework to tackle life head-on. But over time, I began to realize something wasn’t right. While Objectivism helped me think clearly and rationally—and brought success in my career—its rigidity often felt brutal, creating conflict with others and leaving me isolated. At the same time, I was influenced by Brad Blanton’s Radical Honesty, which taught me to be direct and transparent. But, as I found out, being brutally honest left me even more isolated. After losing jobs and girlfriends, I realized that tact and timing had their place if only to stop holiday dinners from being awkward. In my thirties, I fell in love with Ibiza, started a business there, and found myself living among the “hippies” in the North of the island. I was immersed in a culture of presence, acceptance, and emotional balance. Despite it clearly being “commie New Age nonsense,” I started to take comfort in it. At this stage, I couldn’t reconcile the two worlds—they felt contradictory, each with strengths and flaws. The Objectivists had logic and discipline but were rigid and isolating, while the hippies offered emotional balance and connection, though their ideas often felt naïve, and smelt of patchouli oil. By my forties, though, I wasn’t dwelling on these questions anymore. My family and career took over, and whatever inner conflict I had didn’t stop me from some success. I was winning awards, making money, and even enjoying a tiny bit of fame in my industry. Life was busy, and I was doing OK. But that’s all it was—OK. Underneath, I wasn’t deeply happy. The rigidity of Objectivism left me angry at a world that didn’t conform to its principles and the ideas I picked up in Ibiza didn’t feel entirely ‘proper’ because they didn’t fit with what I thought was ‘objective reality.’ Then, everything changed. Just after my 50th birthday, during the COVID-19 lockdowns, a life-shattering event hit me like a wrecking ball. In an instant, I lost my career, my family, and my friends. I was still alive, but my life was gone. In the years that followed, I returned to the basics—the principles of honesty, rationality, and reason that had guided me in my twenties. I needed something solid to navigate my new reality. But as I leaned on Objectivism, I realized it wasn’t enough. That’s when I began to see a way to reconcile the two worlds I’d been torn between. By consolidating the discipline, logic, and responsibility of Objectivism with the grounding and emotional balance I’d glimpsed in the drum circles of Ibiza, I developed a framework that felt both practical and deeply human.
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Parenting for Dads

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