WhatFriendsDo: Kitchen Chats

By: Aimee Kandrac
  • Summary

  • When a major life event occurs, you call your friends and you gather in the kitchen to provide support, share stories, create nourishment, and start to get life taken care of. The Kitchen Chats podcast is all about those moments. On each episode WhatFriendsDo CEO Aimee Kandrac and a guest sit down in her kitchen to share actionable, accessible advice that can help you, your friends, and your family navigate the difficult times in life when you may not know what to do next. You'll get ideas for how to help someone in your own life who may be struggling, and we’ll destigmatize asking for help when you’re the one in a tough situation.
    2022
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Episodes
  • Retreating after a major event
    Mar 19 2025

    Host Aimee Kandrac and Dr. Samantha Franklin about the importance of allowing oneself to retreat after major life events. Here's a breakdown of the key themes and points discussed:

    Key Themes:

    • The Validity of Retreating:
      • The episode emphasizes that it's perfectly acceptable and often necessary to withdraw from social interactions after experiencing significant life changes.
      • Dr. Franklin, a self-proclaimed introvert, explains how retreating provides comfort, control, and a space for emotional regulation.
      • The hosts discuss how major life events can make individuals feel as though their lives have stopped, while the world around them continues, leading to feelings of isolation and a need to retreat.
    • Communication Challenges and Boundaries:
      • The conversation addresses the difficulties of communicating personal struggles and the importance of respecting boundaries.
      • They discuss the challenges of sharing sensitive information, the potential for gossip, and the need to be selective about who one confides in.
      • The hosts highlight the importance of being honest about one's needs and limitations, and the validity of saying "no" to social engagements.
    • Supporting Others in Retreat:
      • The episode provides practical tips for supporting individuals who are retreating, such as sending thoughtful text messages, delivering porch drop-offs, and respecting their need for solitude.
      • They discuss the importance of being mindful of boundaries and avoiding unsolicited advice or intrusions.
      • The hosts emphasize the value of simple gestures, such as sending books or gift cards for massages, as ways to show support without overwhelming the individual.
    • Grief and Emotional Processing:
      • The conversation touches on the nature of grief, acknowledging that it can arise from various life events, not just death.
      • They discuss the importance of allowing oneself and others ample time to grieve and process emotions.
      • The hosts share personal anecdotes about the difficulties of navigating social interactions while grieving.
    • The importance of listening:
      • The importance of listening to the verbal and non-verbal cues of others.
      • The importance of whole body listening.
    • The importance of boundaries:
      • Respecting others boundaries.
      • Creating and maintaining personal boundaries.

    Key Points:

    • Retreating is a valid coping mechanism for dealing with major life transitions.
    • Communication after traumatic events can be difficult.
    • Respecting boundaries is essential for supporting those in retreat.
    • Simple gestures of support can be highly meaningful.
    • Grief is a complex and individual process.
    • The importance of self care.
    • The importance of not taking things personal.

    This detailed summary captures the essence of the podcast episode and its valuable insights into navigating major life transitions.

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    41 mins
  • The Importance of Team
    Feb 25 2025

    This conversation between Aimee and Charlie explores the importance of teamwork during major life transitions. Here's a summary of their discussion:

    • Teamwork Beyond Sports: While the concept of a team is often associated with sports, they emphasize its relevance in navigating life's challenges. Just as a race car driver relies on a pit crew, individuals facing transitions need a support system.
    • Defining Your Team: They discuss the different roles people play on your team, from close family and friends to professionals like doctors or therapists. The team can also include unexpected individuals who offer support in surprising ways.
    • The Importance of Asking for Help: They acknowledge the difficulty of asking for help, often due to feelings of vulnerability or fear of rejection. They stress that allowing others to help is beneficial for both the giver and the receiver.
    • Giving Others the Opportunity to Help: They highlight the importance of being specific when asking for help and recognizing the unique gifts and talents of those in your support system. This allows people to contribute in ways that are meaningful to them.
    • The Role of Grief in Seeking Help: They explore the connection between grief and the reluctance to ask for help. Grief over the loss of a previous life, independence, or capabilities can make it harder to reach out.
    • Practicing Asking for Help: They suggest that practicing asking for help in small ways can make it easier to do so during larger crises. Just as athletes train for competition, individuals should practice building and utilizing their support system.
    • Unexpected Support: They share stories of receiving help from unexpected sources, emphasizing the importance of being open to support from various avenues.
    • Vulnerability and Connection: They discuss the vulnerability involved in asking for help and the importance of fostering strong connections with others to build a reliable support network.
    • Kitchen Moments: They define "kitchen moments" as significant conversations that take place in an intimate setting, often involving difficult or life-changing news. Charlie shares his "kitchen moment" of receiving his diabetes diagnosis.

    This conversation highlights the value of community, vulnerability, and recognizing the interconnectedness of human experience when navigating life's inevitable transitions.

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    44 mins
  • The Multifaceted Nature of Grief
    Feb 19 2025

    This podcast episode of Kitchen Chats explores the multifaceted nature of grief, emphasizing that it's not solely tied to death but arises from various life transitions like divorce, empty nesting, or even positive changes. Host Aimee Kandrac and guest, Ashley Parsons, discuss how the commonly referenced "five stages of grief" are often misapplied and can make people feel like they're grieving incorrectly. They highlight that grief and joy can coexist, and asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. The conversation offers practical advice for supporting someone grieving, stressing the importance of empathy, active listening, and respecting individual grieving processes. They suggest offering concrete help, like cooking or running errands, and acknowledge the vulnerability involved in both needing and offering support. Ultimately, the podcast encourages listeners to expand their understanding of grief, embrace its complexities, and prioritize self-care while navigating life's inevitable changes.

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    42 mins
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