Episodes

  • Wimbledon tennis players as footballers & the floodgates threshold
    Jul 2 2025
    Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare & David Walker. On the agenda: The return of an allegedly iconic football TV programme, a never-before-seen method of laying out a starting XI, fears for an England team in a European major-tournament heatwave and the hypothetical situation of a team that wins every single game 1-0. Meanwhile, the panel imagine Wimbledon tennis players as footballers and decide when a game's "floodgates" can be opened. Sign up for Dreamland, the new members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive new show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Get your ticket for the Football Clichés Live tour this October: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Download SAILY in your app store and use our code CLICHES at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    55 mins
  • 5-a-side injury updates & watching TV football from an acute angle: The listeners' loves & hates
    Jun 25 2025
    Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the selections are the injury reports in 5-a-side group chats, players who look like they think throw-ins are beneath them, the horror of watching a game on a TV from an angle of less than 40 degrees and the unsatisfying asterisk that looms over at least half a dozen major international tournament winners since 1954. Meanwhile, the Adjudication Panel ponder how many departing players make an "exodus". Sign up for Dreamland, the new members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive new show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Get your ticket for the Football Clichés Live tour this October: https://myticket.co.uk/artists/football-cliches-live Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    1 hr and 8 mins
  • ”The most involved-goals man", Swiss Army knives & watching the Roy Keane film trailer
    Jun 23 2025
    Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: which player could most plausibly play for all 32 Club World Cup teams, the inevitability of Ref Cam in the Premier League, more inappropriate EFL new-signing language, slightly desperate football references in Channel 4 TV listings, describing players as "Swiss Army knives" and the first glimpse of Steve Coogan’s big-screen Mick McCarthy Meanwhile, the panel decide the cut-off point for declaring a successful penalty was "never in doubt" and what it would take for a player operating outside Europe to win the Ballon d'Or. Sign up for Dreamland, the new members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive new show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Get your ticket for the Football Clichés Live tour this October: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    1 hr and 1 min
  • The Pure Bundesliga XI
    Jun 18 2025
    Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare, David Walker and Bundesliga commentator Kevin Hatchard to compile the quintessential lineup of players from modern German football. The selection process involves some unhinged goalkeepers, giant defenders fathered by US military servicemen, lesser-known Brazilians, meat-and-potatoes midfielders, Japanese imports who stayed forever, German Under-21 internationals with English mums, a walking advert fort German footballing mentality, a Brazilian striker with no more than four caps for the Selecao and a lumbering German journeyman to spearhead the whole thing. Sign up for Dreamland, the new members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive new show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Get your ticket for the Football Clichés Live tour this October: https://tickets.footballcliches.com Download SAILY in your app store and use our code CLICHES at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    1 hr and 16 mins
  • Count Infantula's Club World Cup, referee kit launches & goal sandwiches
    Jun 16 2025
    Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: some early Club World Cup observations (including DAZN's motley crew of pundits and co-commentators), an unexpected Nigel Farage-based analogy, barely-audible Andy Hinchcliffe co-commentary in Ukrainian dance music, Kyle Walker's Turkish Super Lig credentials, a double header of football references in audiobooks and the Lampard & Gerrard of darts. Meanwhile, the panel examine the concept of "showing too much of the ball to the defender" and enjoy the launch material for next season's referee kits. Sign up for Dreamland, the new members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive new show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Get your ticket for the Football Clichés Live tour this October: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    55 mins
  • Heavy England shirts, absolute clinics & Club World Cup curiosity levels
    Jun 11 2025
    & David Walker. On the agenda: the half-hearted fallout from England 1-3 Senegal, Scotland's George Hirst mixes up his metaphorical goalscoring relief, why Claudio Ranieri should go to the World Cup, an unexpected exclamation from a South American commentator and cash vs curiosity as the Club World Cup looms. Meanwhile, the panel enjoy some elite-level Reddit pedantry and thrash out the definition of putting on a footballing "clinic". Sign up for Dreamland, the new members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive new show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Download SAILY in your app store and use our code CLICHES at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    56 mins
  • Dixon is the new Lawro, Ange's logical next move & "where the dust mites dwell”
    Jun 9 2025
    Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the Clichés army react to Dave's big news, Thomas Tuchel enters familiar territory for an England manager, Lee Dixon continues to settle into his co-commentary caricature, Ange Postecoglou and other managers "always welcome back at [Stadium X]", acceptable new-signing adjectives from EFL social media admins, Conor Coady's hyper-logical next move and news of the 2025 Football Clichés Live tour. Meanwhile, the panel tick off the only club in the top five tiers of English football to have never been mentioned on the pod. Sign up for Dreamland, the new members-only Football Clichés experience, to access our exclusive new show and much more: https://dreamland.footballcliches.com Visit nordvpn.com/cliches to get four extra months on a two-year plan with NordVPN Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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    45 mins