
The Housewives
The Real Story Behind the Real Housewives
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Narrated by:
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Brian Moylan
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By:
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Brian Moylan
About this listen
From Brian Moylan, the writer of Vulture’s legendary Real Housewives recaps, a table-flipping, finger-pointing, halter-topping VIP journey through reality TV’s greatest saga....
In the spring of 2006, a new kind of show premiered on Bravo: The Real Housewives of Orange County. Its stars were tanned, taut, and bedazzled; their homes were echoey California villas; and their drama was gossip-fueled, wine-drenched, and absolutely exquisite. Fifteen seasons on, RHOC is an institution, along with The Real Housewives of New York, Atlanta, New Jersey, Miami, Potomac, and more. Over the years these ladies have done a lot more than lunch, launching thirty-one books, a cocktail line, two jail sentences, a couple supermodel daughters, Andy Cohen’s talk show career, 36 divorces, 14 albums, a White House party crash, and approximately one million memes.
Brian Moylan has been there through it all, in front of the screen and behind the scenes. The writer of Vulture’s beloved series recaps, he’s here to tell us the full story, from the inside scoop on every classic throwdown to the questions we’ve always wanted to know, like - what are the housewives really like off-camera? (The same.) How much money do they make? (Lots.) He has a lot to say about the legacy and fandom of a franchise that’s near and dear to his heart, and inextricable from pop culture today.
A must-have for any fan of real drama and fake [redacted], The Housewives is the definitive companion to an American TV treasure.
A Macmillan Audio production from Flatiron Books
"In The Housewives entertainment journalist and self-proclaimed Real Housewives anthropologist Moylan provides a complete history of the franchise, which thanks to interviews both on and off the record with members of the production team as well as current and former housewives is both painstakingly thorough and incredibly juicy...In the words of former Housewife Bethenny Frankel, Moylan truly “mentions it all.” (Booklist, starred review)
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She Reminds Me of a Bigger Milania
- By DFW on 10-11-17
By: Teresa Giudice
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Superficial
- More Adventures from the Andy Cohen Diaries
- By: Andy Cohen
- Narrated by: Andy Cohen
- Length: 14 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Hopping from the Hamptons to the Manhattan dating world, the dog park to the red carpet, Cardinals superfan and mama's boy Andy Cohen, with Wacha in tow, is the kind of star fans are dying to be friends with. This book gives them that chance. If The Andy Cohen Diaries was deemed "the literary equivalent of a Fresca and tequila" by Jimmy Fallon, Superficial is a double: dishier, juicier, and friskier. In this account of his escapades, Andy tells us not only what goes down but exactly what he thinks.
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Wanted to love it...but
- By Jaci on 11-19-16
By: Andy Cohen
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Turning the Tables
- By: Teresa Giudice, K. C. Baker
- Narrated by: Teresa Giudice
- Length: 8 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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The star of The Real Housewives of New Jersey and three-time New York Times best-selling author offers a behind-the-scenes look at life in prison, her marriage, her rise to fame, the importance of her family, and the reality TV franchise that made her a household name in her explosive and ultimately uplifting first-ever memoir.
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Worst Narration in Audible History
- By Aida on 02-09-16
By: Teresa Giudice, and others
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Give Them Lala
- By: Lala Kent
- Narrated by: Lala Kent
- Length: 5 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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What does “Give them Lala” mean? It means giving the truest, most honest version of yourself to the world. It means being authentic, bold, adventurous, and having an unapologetic approach to life. Hollywood is where Lauren Burningham, aspiring actress from Utah, fully embraced her alter-ego Lala Kent, entrepreneur, entertainer, and film and television star. Some say she’s rude; Lala says she claps back. Some say she’s too bold; Lala knows she’s reality TV gold. Truth is, without giving them Lala, Lauren could never have become the woman she is today.
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Exhausting and forgettable
- By OklahomaMomma on 05-05-21
By: Lala Kent
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You Can't Have It All
- The Basic B*tch Guide to Taking the Pressure Off
- By: Stassi Schroeder
- Narrated by: Stassi Schroeder
- Length: 6 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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The two-time New York Times bestselling author, OG Vanderpump Rules star, and host of the successful chart-topping podcast Stassi is back and better than ever with a candid guide to rethinking the girlboss life, taking the pressure off, and lessons she’s learned since becoming a mom of two.
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Relatable
- By Mandi Wasik on 10-07-24
By: Stassi Schroeder
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Caviar Dreams, Tuna Fish Budget
- How to Survive in Business and Life
- By: Margaret Josephs
- Narrated by: Margaret Josephs
- Length: 6 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Margaret Josephs is a hustler. She’s a tough cookie. She speaks her mind. She never leaves the house without lipstick on. She’s also a devoted wife, mother, daughter, businesswoman, lifestyle expert, and fan-favorite star of the reality TV series The Real Housewives of New Jersey. Sounds pretty glamorous, right? Well, things are never exactly as they seem.
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Love “the Marge!”
- By katie grither on 04-22-21
By: Margaret Josephs
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The Andy Cohen Diaries
- A Deep Look at a Shallow Year
- By: Andy Cohen
- Narrated by: Andy Cohen
- Length: 13 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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In this dishy, detailed diary of one year in his life, Andy goes out on the town, drops names, hosts a ton of shows, becomes codependent with Real Housewives, makes trouble, calls his mom, drops some more names, and, while searching for love, finds it with a dog. We learn everything from which celebrity peed in her WWHL dressing room to which Housewives are causing trouble and how. Nothing is off limits - including dating.
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I wanted to like this... But I just can't
- By cyndi on 12-10-15
By: Andy Cohen
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Next Level Basic
- The Definitive Basic Bitch Handbook
- By: Stassi Schroeder
- Narrated by: Stassi Schroeder
- Length: 4 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Discover how to embrace your best basic self in this laugh-out-loud funny guide from the breakout star of Bravo’s hit reality show Vanderpump Rules, perfect for fans of the relatable and entertaining books by the Betches and Andi Dorfman.
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I cant belive I wasted a credit on this
- By Kela Carie on 04-16-19
By: Stassi Schroeder
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Off with My Head
- The Definitive Basic B*tch Handbook to Surviving Rock Bottom
- By: Stassi Schroeder
- Narrated by: Stassi Schroeder
- Length: 7 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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The year 2020 was going to be the best year of Stassi’s life. Besides getting engaged and feeling like she was on top of the world career-wise, she bought her first house and was planning her dream Italian wedding. The future showed so much freaking promise—until it all went to hell. Stassi may not be perfect—she may have made some (major) mistakes—but she does feel like she has some insight (and plenty of hilarious tales) about getting knocked up, called out, and learning from what went wrong.
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Really Wanted to Like This, But...
- By Cathie on 08-09-23
By: Stassi Schroeder
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I'll Have What She's Having
- By: Chelsea Handler
- Narrated by: Chelsea Handler
- Length: 6 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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At ten years old, Chelsea opened a lemonade stand and realized she’d make more money if the drinks were spiked. So she added vodka to her recipe and used her earnings to upgrade herself to first-class on a family vacation—leaving her parents and siblings in coach. She moved to Los Angeles and got fired from her temp job when she admitted she didn’t know how to transfer calls. She’s played pickleball with the scions of an American dynasty. She’s sexted a governor. She shared psychedelics with strangers in Spain.
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Per Usual, Chelsea Knocks it Out of the Park!
- By Dalontrius on 02-27-25
By: Chelsea Handler
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This Far
- My Story of Love, Loss, and Embracing the Light
- By: Allison Holker
- Narrated by: Suzanne Elise Freeman
- Length: 8 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Allison Holker was just eighteen when she found fame as a contestant on the reality TV show So You Think You Can Dance. Over the next several years, she had her first child, built a successful career as a professional dancer despite the industry being hostile to working moms, and fell in love with and married fellow dancer Stephen Boss, the former hype man and DJ of The Ellen DeGeneres Show known for his charisma and relentless positivity
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I hated the voice.
- By Melissa Schoonover on 02-12-25
By: Allison Holker
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Over the Influence
- A Memoir
- By: Joanna "JoJo" Levesque
- Narrated by: Joanna "JoJo" Levesque
- Length: 9 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Signed to a major recording deal at just 12 years old, JoJo catapulted to the top of the pop-and-R&B-infused charts in the mid 2000's. The relatability of her youth and the appeal of her cool-girl mystique earned her millions of fans around the world. JoJo was an undeniable superstar and pop culture fixture, spanning roles in major studio films, omnipresence on Top 40 radio, frequenting magazine covers, and appearing on national TV. Then, out of the blue, everything came to a halt and JoJo seemingly stepped out of the spotlight, leaving many fans to wonder: What happened to JoJo?
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Deeply Moving and Relatable in Ways You Might Not Expect
- By rosey on 09-25-24
What listeners say about The Housewives
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- R. Stuart
- 07-06-21
Fun book but terrible narration
Obviously I’m a huge housewives fan (why else would I read this book). I learned lots of new fun facts. Unfortunately I was constantly cringing when Moylan kept mispronouncing Bravolebrities’ names- c’mon man haven’t you watched these shows you’re writing about?! Also he just isn’t someone who should be narrating books.
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- Lisa
- 07-16-21
Wanted to love it
I’m a total sucker & will buy just about any book housewives related or housewife written. I know who Brian Moylan is & I’ll be honest I expected better. I learned a few things but SLOW DOWN I had to adjust the speed bk 2 notches to understand the run on sentence this felt like.
Still happy I read it but I wish they’d have some else read this audio bk. I’d probably enjoyed it more if I read it old school.
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1 person found this helpful
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- joseph
- 05-25-22
All Housewives, All the Time
Brian Moylan’s exhaustive (exhausting?) overview of The Housewives franchise is not without its merits.
Including an in-depth look at the history of reality tv and of the Bravo channel itself, I think this book might best be enjoyed by those who are VERY familiar with all iterations of the franchise. I only watch three of the cities, so certain anecdotes didn’t land for me.
Moylan is a fine narrator, even if his similes can be a bit belabored.
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- Quinn
- 05-29-21
He mentioned it all and made it nice.
As a lifelong Housewives fan I was unsure how much I would actually learn from this book, especially once I learned Bravo had tried to stop any Housewives from contributing, but I was pleasantly surprised.
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6 people found this helpful
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- Brittney
- 06-17-21
Loved it!
If you are a housewives fan, a bravo fan, or a reality tv fan you'll thoroughly enjoy this listen!
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- Laurie
- 06-09-21
The Real Tea of the Real Housewives
I loved every delicious word of this book! I knew Brian had contributed to Erika Jayne’s memoir, Pretty Mess, and who knows how many others he helped ghostwrite (I heard Carol’s book, but who knows…) so I knew this was going to be GOOD.
(Meanwhile, am I officially feuding with Radziwill now?? I AM a Countess Lu stan… soooo… “Ratzville!”)
Once again, Brian Moylan exceeds expectation. It’s no wonder Bravo worked so hard to sabotage this book, because they knew he had the insider info you’re not going to get anywhere else.
Too bad for Bravo Brian is so well-loved and respected in the Bravoverse….
I know once they had called everyone and told them not to talk to me, I would have thrown my hands up and given up, but not Brian! He pressed forward, and my need for the REAL tea has been satisfied.
I knew those “history of reality tv” episodes Andy did on E! were super whitewashed and this is thanks to Brian who has proven there is so. much. more. to the story, and I am here LIVING FOR IT.
Thank you, Brian!! I loved loved LOVEDDDDD having this read to me in your voice!!
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- hd1718
- 06-10-21
Loved it.
I loved it. It was all things Bravo. If you are a fan of the houswives then this is a must!
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- Kindle Customer
- 06-08-21
Loved it!
I was sad when it was over! Normally I'd be ready for a book to be over but this was so interesting I just wasn't ready!
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- ATKS
- 06-11-21
Fun Read
This book was a quick fun read for any of us real housewives devotees. Great
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- Thom Pierson
- 06-11-21
Preachy irony and mispronunciations
First, the author/narrator has an awful voice, as he should have read more slowly so that he could better pronounce “complicated” words.
During a “lecture” on how different casts approach diversity, he mentions that Asian cast members have been added to Dallas and Beverly Hills and “diversity should not be the seasoning to add at the end of the dish... The new dish should be ‘a stir-fry’.”
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