
Selling Dead People's Things
Inexplicably True Tales, Vintage Fails & Objects of Objectionable Estates
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
$0.99/mo for the first 3 months

Buy for $24.95
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
Duane Scott Cerny
About this listen
Selling Dead People’s Things is a wry behind-the-curtain peek into the world of antiques and their obsessive owners—while still alive and after their passing. An amusing observer of the human condition, author Duane Scott Cerny entertains in illuminating, scary, sad, or frightfully funny resale tales and essays. Whether processing the estate of a hoarding beekeeper, disassembling the retro remains of an infamous haunted hospital, or conducting an impromptu appraisal during a shiva gone disturbingly wrong, every day is a twisted treasure hunt for this 21st-century antiques dealer.
While digging deep into the basements, attics, and souls of the most interesting collectors imaginable, traveling from one odd house call to the curious next, resale predicaments will confound your every turn. Be careful where you step, watch what you touch, and gird your heart—Antiques Roadshow, this ain’t!
©2018 Duane Scott Cerny (P)2022 Duane Scott CernyListeners also enjoyed...
-
Secret City
- The Hidden History of Gay Washington
- By: James Kirchick
- Narrated by: Ron Butler
- Length: 26 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
For decades, the specter of homosexuality haunted Washington. The mere suggestion that a person might be gay destroyed reputations, ended careers, and ruined lives. At the height of the Cold War, fear of homosexuality became intertwined with the growing threat of international communism, leading to a purge of gay men and lesbians from the federal government. In the fevered atmosphere of political Washington, the secret “too loathsome to mention” held enormous, terrifying power.
-
-
Exhausting snd enraging and disappointing
- By Frequent shopper! on 07-16-22
By: James Kirchick
-
The Civil War: A Narrative, Volume I, Fort Sumter to Perryville
- By: Shelby Foote
- Narrated by: Grover Gardner
- Length: 42 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The Civil War: A Narrative, Volume 1 begins one of the most remarkable works of history ever fashioned. All the great battles are here, of course, from Bull Run through Shiloh, the Seven Days Battles, and Antietam, but so are the smaller ones: Ball's Bluff, Fort Donelson, Pea Ridge, Island Ten, New Orleans, and Monitor versus Merrimac.
-
-
OUTSTANDING! I'M PROUD TO BE A BLACK AMERICAN!!
- By The Louligan on 08-22-13
By: Shelby Foote
-
Happy-Go-Lucky
- By: David Sedaris
- Narrated by: David Sedaris
- Length: 7 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Back when restaurant menus were still printed on paper, and wearing a mask—or not—was a decision made mostly on Halloween, David Sedaris spent his time doing normal things. As Happy-Go-Lucky opens, he is learning to shoot guns with his sister, visiting muddy flea markets in Serbia, buying gummy worms to feed to ants, and telling his nonagenarian father wheelchair jokes. But then the pandemic hits, and like so many others, he’s stuck in lockdown, unable to tour and read for audiences, the part of his work he loves most.
-
-
Great except for an audio glitch
- By Rynnkins on 06-01-22
By: David Sedaris
-
Calypso
- By: David Sedaris
- Narrated by: David Sedaris
- Length: 6 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
If you've ever laughed your way through David Sedaris's cheerfully misanthropic stories, you might think you know what you're getting with Calypso. You'd be wrong. When he buys a beach house on the Carolina coast, Sedaris envisions long, relaxing vacations spent playing board games and lounging in the sun with those he loves most. And it's as idyllic as he imagined, except for one tiny, vexing realization: it's impossible to take a vacation from yourself. With Calypso, Sedaris sets his formidable powers of observation - and dark humor - toward middle age and mortality.
-
-
Excellent, as always
- By Ruthie on 05-31-18
By: David Sedaris
-
Me Talk Pretty One Day
- By: David Sedaris
- Narrated by: David Sedaris
- Length: 5 hrs and 51 mins
- Abridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
David Sedaris' collection of essays - including live recordings! - tells a most unconventional life story. With every clever turn of a phrase, Sedaris brings a view and a voice like no other to every unforgettable encounter. You can also listen to Sedaris in an interview with Terry Gross on Fresh Air.
-
-
Subtly Funny Musings on Life Experiences
- By FanB14 on 09-03-12
By: David Sedaris
-
Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim
- By: David Sedaris
- Narrated by: David Sedaris
- Length: 6 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In his newest collection of essays, David Sedaris lifts the corner of ordinary life, revealing the absurdity teeming below its surface. His world is alive with obscure desires and hidden motives, a world where forgiveness is automatic and an argument can be the highest form of love. Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim is another unforgettable collection from one of the wittiest and most original writers at work today.
-
-
Sedaris is the gay Mark Twain.
- By Steve on 06-02-04
By: David Sedaris
-
Secret City
- The Hidden History of Gay Washington
- By: James Kirchick
- Narrated by: Ron Butler
- Length: 26 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
For decades, the specter of homosexuality haunted Washington. The mere suggestion that a person might be gay destroyed reputations, ended careers, and ruined lives. At the height of the Cold War, fear of homosexuality became intertwined with the growing threat of international communism, leading to a purge of gay men and lesbians from the federal government. In the fevered atmosphere of political Washington, the secret “too loathsome to mention” held enormous, terrifying power.
-
-
Exhausting snd enraging and disappointing
- By Frequent shopper! on 07-16-22
By: James Kirchick
-
The Civil War: A Narrative, Volume I, Fort Sumter to Perryville
- By: Shelby Foote
- Narrated by: Grover Gardner
- Length: 42 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The Civil War: A Narrative, Volume 1 begins one of the most remarkable works of history ever fashioned. All the great battles are here, of course, from Bull Run through Shiloh, the Seven Days Battles, and Antietam, but so are the smaller ones: Ball's Bluff, Fort Donelson, Pea Ridge, Island Ten, New Orleans, and Monitor versus Merrimac.
-
-
OUTSTANDING! I'M PROUD TO BE A BLACK AMERICAN!!
- By The Louligan on 08-22-13
By: Shelby Foote
-
Happy-Go-Lucky
- By: David Sedaris
- Narrated by: David Sedaris
- Length: 7 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Back when restaurant menus were still printed on paper, and wearing a mask—or not—was a decision made mostly on Halloween, David Sedaris spent his time doing normal things. As Happy-Go-Lucky opens, he is learning to shoot guns with his sister, visiting muddy flea markets in Serbia, buying gummy worms to feed to ants, and telling his nonagenarian father wheelchair jokes. But then the pandemic hits, and like so many others, he’s stuck in lockdown, unable to tour and read for audiences, the part of his work he loves most.
-
-
Great except for an audio glitch
- By Rynnkins on 06-01-22
By: David Sedaris
-
Calypso
- By: David Sedaris
- Narrated by: David Sedaris
- Length: 6 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
If you've ever laughed your way through David Sedaris's cheerfully misanthropic stories, you might think you know what you're getting with Calypso. You'd be wrong. When he buys a beach house on the Carolina coast, Sedaris envisions long, relaxing vacations spent playing board games and lounging in the sun with those he loves most. And it's as idyllic as he imagined, except for one tiny, vexing realization: it's impossible to take a vacation from yourself. With Calypso, Sedaris sets his formidable powers of observation - and dark humor - toward middle age and mortality.
-
-
Excellent, as always
- By Ruthie on 05-31-18
By: David Sedaris
-
Me Talk Pretty One Day
- By: David Sedaris
- Narrated by: David Sedaris
- Length: 5 hrs and 51 mins
- Abridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
David Sedaris' collection of essays - including live recordings! - tells a most unconventional life story. With every clever turn of a phrase, Sedaris brings a view and a voice like no other to every unforgettable encounter. You can also listen to Sedaris in an interview with Terry Gross on Fresh Air.
-
-
Subtly Funny Musings on Life Experiences
- By FanB14 on 09-03-12
By: David Sedaris
-
Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim
- By: David Sedaris
- Narrated by: David Sedaris
- Length: 6 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In his newest collection of essays, David Sedaris lifts the corner of ordinary life, revealing the absurdity teeming below its surface. His world is alive with obscure desires and hidden motives, a world where forgiveness is automatic and an argument can be the highest form of love. Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim is another unforgettable collection from one of the wittiest and most original writers at work today.
-
-
Sedaris is the gay Mark Twain.
- By Steve on 06-02-04
By: David Sedaris
-
When You Are Engulfed in Flames
- By: David Sedaris
- Narrated by: David Sedaris
- Length: 9 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Once again, David Sedaris brings together a collection of essays so uproariously funny and profoundly moving that his legions of fans will fall for him all over again. He tests the limits of love when Hugh lances a boil from his backside, and pushes the boundaries of laziness when, finding the water shut off in his house in Normandy, he looks to the water in a vase of fresh cut flowers to fill the coffee machine.
-
-
Don't Start with this One
- By Elvie on 04-28-16
By: David Sedaris
-
Holidays on Ice
- Featuring Six New Stories
- By: David Sedaris
- Narrated by: David Sedaris
- Length: 4 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
David Sedaris's beloved holiday collection is new again with six more pieces, including a never before published story. Along with such favorites as the diaries of a Macy's elf and the annals of two very competitive families, are Sedaris's tales of tardy trick-or-treaters ("Us and Them"); the difficulties of explaining the Easter Bunny to the French ("Jesus Shaves"); and what to do when you've been locked out in a snowstorm ("Let It Snow").
-
-
Best When In SantaLand
- By Dave on 12-06-11
By: David Sedaris
-
Spoonbenders
- A novel
- By: Daryl Gregory
- Narrated by: Ari Fliakos
- Length: 14 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Teddy Telemachus is a charming con man with a gift for sleight of hand and some shady underground associates. In need of cash, he tricks his way into a classified government study about telekinesis and its possible role in intelligence gathering. There he meets Maureen McKinnon, and it's not just her piercing blue eyes that leave Teddy forever charmed but her mind - Maureen is a genuine psychic of immense and mysterious power.
-
-
Slow start, but patience is your friend here.
- By Heather on 08-22-17
By: Daryl Gregory
-
Severance
- A Novel
- By: Ling Ma
- Narrated by: Nancy Wu
- Length: 9 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Candace Chen, a millennial drone self-sequestered in a Manhattan office tower, is devoted to routine. With the recent passing of her Chinese immigrant parents, she’s had her fill of uncertainty. She’s content just to carry on: She goes to work, troubleshoots the teen-targeted Gemstone Bible, watches movies in a Greenpoint basement with her boyfriend. So Candace barely notices when a plague of biblical proportions sweeps New York.
-
-
4.19 stars
- By ibillinsly@gmail on 12-06-18
By: Ling Ma
-
Barrel Fever and Other Stories
- By: David Sedaris
- Narrated by: David Sedaris, Amy Sedaris
- Length: 2 hrs and 59 mins
- Abridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In David Sedaris' world, no one is safe and no cow is sacred. A manic cross between Mark Leyner, Fran Lebowitz, and the National Enquirer, Sedaris' collection of essays is a rollicking tour through the national Zeitgeist: a do-it-yourself suburban dad saves money by performing home surgery; a man who is loved too much flees the heavyweight champion of the world; a teenage suicide tries to incite a lynch mob at her funeral; a bitter Santa abuses the elves.
-
-
Be warned- Santaland Diaries is NOT included
- By David on 06-05-12
By: David Sedaris
-
I Still Dream About You
- A Novel
- By: Fannie Flagg
- Narrated by: Fannie Flagg
- Length: 10 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Meet Maggie Fortenberry, a still beautiful former Miss Alabama. To others, Maggie’s life seems practically perfect - she’s lovely, charming, and a successful real estate agent at Red Mountain Realty. Still, Maggie can’t help but wonder how she wound up in her present condition....
-
-
Flagging this audio
- By Meryl on 12-16-10
By: Fannie Flagg
-
If You Were Here
- A Novel
- By: Jen Lancaster
- Narrated by: Jamie Heinlein
- Length: 8 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The fiction debut of the New York Times best-selling author of My Fair Lazy. Told in the uproariously entertaining voice readers have come to expect from Jen Lancaster, If You Were Here follows Amish-zombie-teen- romance author Mia and her husband Mac (and their pets) through the alternately frustrating, exciting, terrifying - but always funny - process of buying and renovating their first home in the Chicago suburbs that John hughes's movies made famous.
-
-
A Jen Lancaster disappointment
- By Carolyn on 10-28-11
By: Jen Lancaster
-
If Walls Could Talk
- Haunted Home Renovation, Book 1
- By: Juliet Blackwell
- Narrated by: Xe Sands
- Length: 7 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Melanie Turner has made quite a name for herself remodeling historic houses in the San Francisco Bay Area. But now her reputation may be on the line. At her newest project, a run-down Pacific Heights mansion, Mel is visited by the ghost of a colleague who recently met a bad end with power tools. Mel hopes that by nailing the killer, she can rid herself of the ghostly presence of the murdered man - and not end up a construction casualty herself....
-
-
A Nice Change
- By Carole T. on 06-15-15
By: Juliet Blackwell
-
Another Man's Treasure
- Palmyrton Estate Sale Mystery Series, Book 1
- By: S.W. Hubbard
- Narrated by: Janelle Tedesco
- Length: 11 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
What really happened to Audrey Nealon’s mother? Did she die in a tragic accident? As the successful owner of an estate sale business, Audrey has put the past behind her. Her mother is a distant memory, her father a problem she keeps closed away. Until the day Audrey clears out the home of a lonely old widow and finds some shocks. Street drugs in the silverware drawer, a trunk full of jewels in the attic, and the distinctive ring Audrey’s mother was wearing the night her car supposedly sank to the bottom of a New Jersey lake.
-
-
Keep your politics out of the storyline.
- By Chris on 01-05-22
By: S.W. Hubbard
-
Shark Tales
- How I Turned $1,000 into a Billion Dollar Business
- By: Barbara Corcoran, Bruce Littlefield
- Narrated by: Barbara Corcoran
- Length: 5 hrs
- Abridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In Shark Tales, Barbara shares her hilarious stories about growing up, getting into trouble, failing miserably, and then starting over again. In each chapter, she comes back to one of her mom's unconventional lessons, and how it applies in the real world of business. Whatever your calling, the homespun lessons that work for Barbara will help you use what you've got to create success in your life.
-
-
One Good Point Made It Worth The Purchase
- By Elartica on 04-11-16
By: Barbara Corcoran, and others
-
When I Married My Mother
- A Daughter's Search for What Really Matters - and How She Found It Caring for Mama Jo
- By: Jo Maeder
- Narrated by: Jo Maeder
- Length: 8 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
A city-loving, single New York DJ braces for disaster when she reluctantly moves to the Bible Belt to care for her estranged, doll-obsessed, hoarder mother. What unfolds in this best-selling memoir is a hilarious, heartbreaking love story that sees eldercare and making peace with the past in a most unexpected way.
-
-
A must read for grown up children
- By Victoria Evangelina on 08-11-16
By: Jo Maeder
-
The Trauma Cleaner
- By: Sarah Krasnostein
- Narrated by: Rachael Tidd
- Length: 9 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Before she was a trauma cleaner, Sandra Pankhurst was many things: husband and father, drag queen, gender reassignment patient, sex worker, small businesswoman, trophy wife... but as a little boy, raised in violence and excluded from the family home, she just wanted to belong. Now she believes her clients deserve no less. A man who bled quietly to death in his living room. Sarah Krasnostein has watched the extraordinary Sandra Pankhurst bring order and care to these, the living and the dead - and the book she has written is equally extraordinary.
-
-
Beautiful, emotional, and perfectly narrated.
- By LitWitWineDine on 06-30-18
What listeners say about Selling Dead People's Things
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Mary
- 12-17-24
Great storytelling and very heartfelt
I loved this book. It made me cry;it made me laugh; it made me think
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Karen
- 09-14-22
Buy Selling Dead People's Things
As someone who has bought and sold more than my share of dead people's things, I enjoyed this book start to finish. Duane Cerny's stories can be both snarky and sweet, and I found myself touched by the characters he encounters and entertained by his unpretentious storytelling. Oh, and as a native Chicagoan, the sound of Duane's Chicago accent was pure comfort food for me. Can't wait to check out his new book, Vintage Confidential.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Bookworm from WV
- 01-03-25
Bad Narrator for Audio-book
Some of the stories were interesting, but overall I found it boring. If I had been reading this book instead of listening to it, I probably would have quit. The narrator’s voice was grating and his lip-smacking was unnerving. If the narrator had just talked like hell was chatting with a friend and skipped the voice imitations, the stories may have been more enjoyable. As it was, it seemed as if it was someone reading from a script, pausing at stringing intervals as if turning the page before finishing a sentence.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!