
Secrets & Shame
Dear Oprah Diaries
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
$0.99/mo for the first 3 months

Buy for $19.95
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
Rozanne Devine
About this listen
James remembers the day he began to plot to kill his father, Harry: It was the day before his seventh birthday, and he finally realized his mom was not going to leave him.
Whenever Harry would beat his mom, James would think, "No, Dad! Stop beating Mom. Look over here at me. I'm the one you are angry with. I'm your sissy son, remember?"
Eventually, Harry would banish James from their Texas home, telling him he was going to pray he'd get AIDS and die. "Our family has been shamed and embarrassed enough by you," he raved. "You'll get what you deserve one day."
James, desperate for the need to be loved and accepted for how God made him, turned to drugs, alcohol, and partying - and before long, he realized he was on the path to becoming an abusive alcoholic just like his father.
He shares how hitting rock bottom led to a Jewish spiritual awakening filled with love and an abiding faith in humanity in Secrets & Shame.
©2016 James W. Mercer Ph.D (P)2017 James W. Mercer Ph.DListeners also enjoyed...
-
Finding Me
- A Memoir
- By: Viola Davis
- Narrated by: Viola Davis
- Length: 9 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In my book, you will meet a little girl named Viola who ran from her past until she made a life-changing decision to stop running forever. This is my story, from a crumbling apartment in Central Falls, Rhode Island, to the stage in New York City, and beyond. This is the path I took to finding my purpose but also my voice in a world that didn’t always see me.
-
-
Absolutely beautifully Written❤️
- By Love bug23 on 05-02-22
By: Viola Davis
-
Etched in Sand
- A True Story of Five Siblings Who Survived an Unspeakable Childhood on Long Island
- By: Regina Calcaterra
- Narrated by: Regina Calcaterra
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In this story of perseverance in the face of adversity, Regina Calcaterra recounts her childhood in foster care and on the streets and how she and her savvy crew of homeless siblings managed to survive years of homelessness, abandonment, and abuse. Regina Calcaterra's emotionally powerful memoir reveals how she endured a series of foster homes and intermittent homelessness in the shadow of the Hamptons, and how she rose above her past while fighting to keep her brother and three sisters together.
-
-
Big eye-opener about our Foster Care system
- By Jo L. on 09-14-16
-
The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao
- By: Junot Diaz
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis, Staci Snell
- Length: 16 hrs
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Oscar is a sweet but disastrously overweight ghetto nerd who—from the New Jersey home he shares with his old world mother and rebellious sister—dreams of becoming the Dominican J.R.R. Tolkien and, most of all, finding love. But Oscar may never get what he wants. Blame the fukú—a curse that has haunted Oscar’s family for generations, following them on their epic journey from Santo Domingo to the USA.
-
-
Wondrous Book!!!
- By Robert on 06-22-12
By: Junot Diaz
-
Carry On, Warrior
- Thoughts on Life Unarmed
- By: Glennon Doyle Melton
- Narrated by: Glennon Doyle Melton
- Length: 7 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Anne Lamott meets Elizabeth Gilbert in this inspirational, side-splittingly funny exploration of the power of living with love, forgiveness, and honesty. Glennon Melton became a sensation when her personal essays started going viral. Giving language to our universal (yet often secret) experiences, her hilarious and poignant observations were read by millions, shared among friends, discussed at water coolers, quoted in The New York Times, and have inspired a social movement.
-
-
Get Ready to Exercise your Bookmarks
- By Molly on 04-17-13
-
Call Me Cockroach
- Based on a True Story
- By: Leigh Byrne
- Narrated by: Allyson Ryan
- Length: 8 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Our prisons and mental hospitals are filled with tragic stories like Tuesday Storm's. Her early childhood was riddled with torturous "games" and violent physical attacks. She was isolated from the rest of her family, locked in an attic with nothing but a bare bed and a bucket for a toilet, and fed just enough to be kept alive. The experts say it's next to impossible to find the soul's light in a dark past like Tuesday's.
-
-
The rest of the story...
- By PJH on 07-11-15
By: Leigh Byrne
-
Mean Baby
- A Memoir of Growing Up
- By: Selma Blair
- Narrated by: Selma Blair
- Length: 9 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The first story Selma Blair Beitner ever heard about herself is that she was a mean, mean baby. With her mouth pulled in a perpetual snarl and a head so furry it had to be rubbed to make way for her forehead, Selma spent years living up to her terrible reputation: biting her sisters, lying spontaneously, getting drunk from Passover wine at the age of seven, and behaving dramatically so that she would be the center of attention. In a memoir that is as wildly funny as it is emotionally shattering, Blair tells the captivating story of growing up and finding her truth.
-
-
Poor little privileged girl...
- By Tesa Fisher on 09-20-22
By: Selma Blair
-
Finding Me
- A Memoir
- By: Viola Davis
- Narrated by: Viola Davis
- Length: 9 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In my book, you will meet a little girl named Viola who ran from her past until she made a life-changing decision to stop running forever. This is my story, from a crumbling apartment in Central Falls, Rhode Island, to the stage in New York City, and beyond. This is the path I took to finding my purpose but also my voice in a world that didn’t always see me.
-
-
Absolutely beautifully Written❤️
- By Love bug23 on 05-02-22
By: Viola Davis
-
Etched in Sand
- A True Story of Five Siblings Who Survived an Unspeakable Childhood on Long Island
- By: Regina Calcaterra
- Narrated by: Regina Calcaterra
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In this story of perseverance in the face of adversity, Regina Calcaterra recounts her childhood in foster care and on the streets and how she and her savvy crew of homeless siblings managed to survive years of homelessness, abandonment, and abuse. Regina Calcaterra's emotionally powerful memoir reveals how she endured a series of foster homes and intermittent homelessness in the shadow of the Hamptons, and how she rose above her past while fighting to keep her brother and three sisters together.
-
-
Big eye-opener about our Foster Care system
- By Jo L. on 09-14-16
-
The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao
- By: Junot Diaz
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis, Staci Snell
- Length: 16 hrs
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Oscar is a sweet but disastrously overweight ghetto nerd who—from the New Jersey home he shares with his old world mother and rebellious sister—dreams of becoming the Dominican J.R.R. Tolkien and, most of all, finding love. But Oscar may never get what he wants. Blame the fukú—a curse that has haunted Oscar’s family for generations, following them on their epic journey from Santo Domingo to the USA.
-
-
Wondrous Book!!!
- By Robert on 06-22-12
By: Junot Diaz
-
Carry On, Warrior
- Thoughts on Life Unarmed
- By: Glennon Doyle Melton
- Narrated by: Glennon Doyle Melton
- Length: 7 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Anne Lamott meets Elizabeth Gilbert in this inspirational, side-splittingly funny exploration of the power of living with love, forgiveness, and honesty. Glennon Melton became a sensation when her personal essays started going viral. Giving language to our universal (yet often secret) experiences, her hilarious and poignant observations were read by millions, shared among friends, discussed at water coolers, quoted in The New York Times, and have inspired a social movement.
-
-
Get Ready to Exercise your Bookmarks
- By Molly on 04-17-13
-
Call Me Cockroach
- Based on a True Story
- By: Leigh Byrne
- Narrated by: Allyson Ryan
- Length: 8 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Our prisons and mental hospitals are filled with tragic stories like Tuesday Storm's. Her early childhood was riddled with torturous "games" and violent physical attacks. She was isolated from the rest of her family, locked in an attic with nothing but a bare bed and a bucket for a toilet, and fed just enough to be kept alive. The experts say it's next to impossible to find the soul's light in a dark past like Tuesday's.
-
-
The rest of the story...
- By PJH on 07-11-15
By: Leigh Byrne
-
Mean Baby
- A Memoir of Growing Up
- By: Selma Blair
- Narrated by: Selma Blair
- Length: 9 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The first story Selma Blair Beitner ever heard about herself is that she was a mean, mean baby. With her mouth pulled in a perpetual snarl and a head so furry it had to be rubbed to make way for her forehead, Selma spent years living up to her terrible reputation: biting her sisters, lying spontaneously, getting drunk from Passover wine at the age of seven, and behaving dramatically so that she would be the center of attention. In a memoir that is as wildly funny as it is emotionally shattering, Blair tells the captivating story of growing up and finding her truth.
-
-
Poor little privileged girl...
- By Tesa Fisher on 09-20-22
By: Selma Blair
-
Miss Brenda and the Loveladies
- A Heartwarming True Story of Grace, God, and Gumption
- By: Brenda Spahn, Irene Zutell
- Narrated by: Pam Ward, Bahni Turpin, Johanna Parker, and others
- Length: 7 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
For Brenda Spahn, entrepreneur and businesswoman, wealth was a lifestyle - until a brush with the law threatened to send her to prison. In those dark moments, Brenda made a promise to God.
Spared incarceration, a renewed Brenda glimpsed into the lives of women serving time in one of the worst places in America - the JuliaTutwiler Prison for Women in Wetumpka, Alabama. What she saw prompted a God-inspired vision. With a heart to help and a will that couldn't be crushed, Brenda fought the system and overcame tremendous obstacles to take ex-cons into her home.
-
-
Grace, God . . . and Giving Back
- By Debbie on 11-10-16
By: Brenda Spahn, and others
-
Finding Me
- A Decade of Darkness, a Life Reclaimed
- By: Michelle Knight, Michelle Burford
- Narrated by: Maria Cabezas
- Length: 7 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Michelle was a young single mother when she was kidnapped by a local school bus driver named Ariel Castro. For more than a decade afterward, she endured unimaginable torture at the hand of her abductor. In 2003 Amanda Berry joined her in captivity, followed by Gina DeJesus in 2004. Their escape on May 6, 2013, made headlines around the world.
-
-
A True House of Horrors!
- By Courtney on 05-12-14
By: Michelle Knight, and others
-
Crazy Is My Superpower
- How I Triumphed by Breaking Bones, Breaking Hearts, and Breaking the Rules
- By: AJ Mendez
- Narrated by: AJ Mendez
- Length: 8 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Recently retired WWE superstar AJ Mendez Brooks is a powerhouse - strong, quirky, and totally confident. But that wasn’t always the case. With humor and tremendous heart, she opens up for the first time about her harrowing struggle to understand her demons and the diagnosis that helped her gain control over her life.
-
-
Expected a wrestling book, got a lot more
- By marcelo on 07-21-17
By: AJ Mendez
-
The Distance Between Us
- A Memoir
- By: Reyna Grande
- Narrated by: Yareli Arizmendi
- Length: 11 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In this inspirational and unflinchingly honest memoir, acclaimed author Reyna Grande describes her childhood torn between the United States and Mexico, and shines a light on the experiences, fears, and hopes of those who choose to make the harrowing journey across the border. Reyna Grande vividly brings to life her tumultuous early years in this “compelling...unvarnished, resonant” (BookPage) story of a childhood spent torn between two parents and two countries.
-
-
opened my eyes to the beauty of our stories
- By Evelyn on 09-18-20
By: Reyna Grande
-
Cinder Girl
- Growing Up on America's Fringe
- By: Holly Thompson Rehder
- Narrated by: Holly Thompson Rehder
- Length: 9 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Growing up on welfare, food stamps, and Greyhound buses, Holly Thompson Rehder quit school at fifteen to help take care of her mother and younger sister after a devastating car accident. Getting married and pregnant soon thereafter, Holly decided that the life she had been born into was not what she intended to give her child. Two decades later she was a successful businesswoman. And today, she is a rising political star who serves as an inspiration to young women across the state of Missouri—and indeed, the entire nation—all while never forgetting where she came from.
-
-
Excellent
- By Daniel Groves on 10-08-24
-
I'm Not Broken
- A Memoir
- By: Jesse Leon
- Narrated by: Jesse Leon
- Length: 9 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Born to indigenous working-class Mexican immigrants in San Diego in the 1970s, Jesse Leon’s childhood was violently ruptured. A dangerous and harrowing encounter at a local gift shop when he was eleven years old left Jesse with a deadly secret. Hurt, alone, and scared for his life, Jesse numbed his pain by losing himself in the hyper-masculine culture of the streets and wherever else he could find it—in alcohol, drugs, and prostitution.
-
-
Very grateful that Jesse shared his journey
- By Adrien L on 03-02-23
By: Jesse Leon
-
It's Okay to Laugh (Crying Is Cool Too)
- By: Nora McInerny Purmort
- Narrated by: Nora McInerny Purmort
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Twentysomething Nora McInerny Purmort bounced from boyfriend to boyfriend and job to job. Then she met Aaron, a charismatic art director and her kindred spirit. They made mixtapes (and pancakes) into the wee hours of the morning. They finished each other's sentences. They just knew. When Aaron was diagnosed with a rare brain cancer, they refused to let it limit their love. They got engaged on Aaron's hospital bed and married after his first surgery. They had a baby when he was on chemo.
-
-
Fresh, brutally raw and honest
- By ashton on 05-31-16
-
CinderGirl
- My Journey out of the Ashes to a Life of Hope
- By: Christina Meredith, Dr. Henry Cloud - foreword
- Narrated by: Hope Hoffman, Gabe Wicks - foreword
- Length: 4 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In CinderGirl, Christina tells her piercing and poignant story of leaving behind homelessness to become Ms. California and the founder of a nonprofit organization that provides advocacy for foster-care children.
-
-
A Reader's Comments
- By Kindle Customer on 08-06-19
By: Christina Meredith, and others
-
Finding Fish
- A Memoir
- By: Antwone Q. Fisher
- Narrated by: Thomas Penny
- Length: 12 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Baby Boy Fisher was raised in institutions from the moment of his birth in prison to a single mother. He ultimately came to live with a foster family, where he endured near-constant verbal and physical abuse. In his midteens he escaped and enlisted in the navy, where he became a man of the world, raised by the family he created for himself. Finding Fish shows how, out of this unlikely mix of deprivation and hope, an artist was born.
-
-
This book will not disappoint you.
- By Joseph on 10-16-16
-
The Plain Choice
- A True Story of Choosing to Live an Amish Life
- By: Sherry Gore, Jeff Hoagland
- Narrated by: Connie Barton
- Length: 5 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Unwilling to return to the darkness of her former life, Sherry Gore attacks her faith head on. Soon the life she remakes for herself and her children as she seeks to follow the teachings of the Bible features head coverings, simple dress, and a focus on Jesus Christ. Only then does she realize, in a fit of excitement, that there are others like her. They are called Amish and Mennonite, and she realizes she has found her people.
-
-
Beautiful and moving
- By Catherine MFJ on 07-19-20
By: Sherry Gore, and others
-
The Road Back to Me
- Healing and Recovering from Co-Dependency, Addiction, Enabling, and Low Self Esteem
- By: Lisa A. Romano
- Narrated by: Gina E. Manegio
- Length: 5 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
This story is told through the jagged peephole of the author's awareness, examining her formative wounds and influences from the perspective of a woman who has now gained experience and wisdom. As she peers over her soul's shoulder, she recalls the chaos of her once-fragile childhood mind. She shudders as she is reminded of the sting of her lonely childhood, her feelings of abandonment, and her painful memories of being bullied.
-
-
NOT a book about recovery
- By M. F. Irvin on 03-20-18
By: Lisa A. Romano
-
Chicken Soup for the Preteen Soul
- Stories of Changes, Choices, and Growing Up for Kids Ages 9-13
- By: Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Patty Hansen, and others
- Narrated by: Mark Victor Hansen, Patty Hansen, Irene Dunlap
- Length: 1 hr and 13 mins
- Abridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Our preteen years, ages nine to 13, can present some of the most difficult times in our young lives, a period of tremendous physical and emotional change. We're eager to leave the "kid" stage, yet we're uncertain about what adolescence will bring; we start hearing the familiar refrain "wait until you're older" far too often. Chicken Soup for the Preteen Soul is a companion guide for these transitional years.
-
-
Great for children!
- By T Renaud on 01-04-15
By: Jack Canfield, and others
What listeners say about Secrets & Shame
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Jason Fulton
- 03-08-17
Awesome read!
awesome book very easy to read loved the narrator very good storyline you must read this I'm sure you'll be able to finish it in one day
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Anonymous User
- 10-10-18
Insider shock to my own heaven and hell theory..
While knowing James for many years , several stories I had yet to hear. Knowing the pain and horrible memories that haunt him seems to give me reassurance of my new found heavy weight lifting light finding experience that has been placed on me recently. Chapter 23 ending at the time I was first truly brought into James family I only assume there will most definitely be a second book. My theory of heaven and hell through my life experience and my own story is, we are walked through a living hell to be able to completely understand and be able to fill the shoes of our actual calling, that being said..we live in hell the first part of our lives until we see the light . The light being our actual purpose of being born and the understanding of why God walked us through the roads of our own hell . For years I have been questioned why we are here , what's the purpose of living, how could good let so many horrible things happen if he can build the world in a day ..and for years the answers have not on been in my face , signs clear as day and people telling me directly the answers I searched 28 years for , but only when it's your time does your answers become light a bright light people speak of or a world lifted off your shoulders . I know there must be a second book because James has yes to speak on just how amazing his life turned to be or the joys of memories of his children etc. I can't wait to read the next book because it's will be that much more hard to put down and hard to not smile and cry and feel angry for his experience or happy for how much he was blessed after walking to his own horrid hell. As a insider I must say I was shocked at somethings I wasn't aware or especially with Harry but my path was much different that James purpose in life . My hell was based on a very different direction I now know so had I known half the things , way, actions or events to that extrem I wouldn't had loved Harry or seen him with the loving eyes and ways of a second father at that time. However that's wasn't my message to hear, my message and viewing on his character is much of the same of people I've come to find I'm here to try and save . That being said, hopefully before they ever began to completely try and destroy someone. I am excited to read book two and understand and have knowledge on where his major breaks came to play this far and how and what hardships were lifted . Personally knowing and loving this family truly as my own for so many years I am honored to have so many blessed memories with each one.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!