
If You Lived Here You'd Be Famous by Now
True Stories from Calabasas
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
$0.99/mo for the first 3 months

Buy for $14.99
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
Via Bleidner
-
By:
-
Via Bleidner
About this listen
This program is read by the author.
If You Lived Here You'd Be Famous by Now is an insider’s collection of funny and warmhearted stories about coming of age in the Los Angeles suburb famed for birthing the Kardashian-Jenners and the Bling Ring.
For Via Bleidner, transferring to Calabasas High from the private Catholic school she’s attended since second grade is a culture shock, not to mention absolutely lonely. Suddenly thrust into an unfamiliar world of celebrities, affluenza, and McMansions, Via takes a page from Cameron Crowe and pretends she’s on a journalism assignment, taking notes on her classmates and jotting down bits of overheard gossip.
Getting through high school in Calabasas is something else - from Kim Kardashian endorsing the students’ favorite hidden lunch spot, to the theater program hiring a famous dog to play Elle Woods' Chihuahua in its production of Legally Blonde, and Kanye trying to take control of your school to make it the very first YEEZY institution.
But instead of floating through high school detached from her peers, Via finds that putting herself out there - for her writing, of course - just might have been exactly what she needed. She unexpectedly finds an eclectic group of friends to call her own, including a multi-multi-millionaire, a wild-card throwback intent on going viral, a former Disney actor, and a doughnut-dealing madman.
With wit, candor, and sharp observations, 21-year-old Via grounds the surreal glamour of Calabasas with reflections on her own coming-of-age, sharing her teenage misadventures as she struggles to fit in, faces crushing social pressure, and eventually makes her own way.
A Macmillan Audio production from Flatiron Books
©2021 Via Bleidner (P)2021 Macmillan AudioListeners also enjoyed...
-
Crying in H Mart
- A Memoir
- By: Michelle Zauner
- Narrated by: Michelle Zauner
- Length: 7 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In this exquisite story of family, food, grief, and endurance, Michelle Zauner proves herself far more than a dazzling singer, songwriter, and guitarist. With humor and heart, she tells of growing up one of the few Asian-American kids at her school in Eugene, Oregon; of struggling with her mother's particular high expectations of her; of a painful adolescence; of treasured months spent in her grandmother's tiny apartment in Seoul, where she and her mother would bond, late at night, over heaping plates of food.
-
-
Broken Korean
- By Tim on 04-21-21
By: Michelle Zauner
-
Becoming a Queen
- By: Dan Clay
- Narrated by: Dan Clay
- Length: 10 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
If only Mark Davis hadn’t put on a dress for the talent show. It was a joke—other guys did it too—but when his boyfriend saw Mark in that dress, everything changed. And now, fresh on the heels of high school heartbreak, Mark has given up on love. Maybe some people are just too much for this world—too weird, too wild, too feminine, too everything. Thankfully, his older brother Eric always knows what to say to keep Mark from spinning into self-loathing. "Be yourself! Your full sequin-y self.”
-
-
Absolutely beautiful
- By Kimberly Yeaw on 02-24-25
By: Dan Clay
-
Rats Saw God
- By: Rob Thomas
- Narrated by: Johnny Heller
- Length: 6 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
By his senior year, Steve York has come through the worst two years of his life. His parents have divorced, and his girlfriend has betrayed him. Worse yet, after running away to live with his mother in San Diego, forays into the drug culture have turned his A-average into a thing of the past. Steve's only hope to graduate on time and avoid summer school is to write a 100-page paper for his guidance counselor. Unfortunately, he has to write about something he knows, and all he knows well are the last two years of his life.
-
-
Real
- By Mary on 06-26-09
By: Rob Thomas
-
Don't Ask Me Where I'm From
- By: Jennifer De Leon
- Narrated by: Inés del Castillo
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
First-generation American LatinX Liliana Cruz does what it takes to fit in at her new nearly all-white school. But when family secrets spill out and racism at school ramps up, she must decide what she believes in and take a stand.
-
-
Stunning, funny, inspiring
- By Customer on 08-27-20
By: Jennifer De Leon
-
Don't Hate the Player
- By: Alexis Nedd
- Narrated by: Aaron Landon, Stacy Gonzalez
- Length: 9 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Emilia Romero is living a double life. By day, she’s a field hockey star with a flawless report card. But by night, she’s kicking virtual ass as the only female member of a highly competitive eSports team. Emilia has mastered the art of keeping her two worlds thriving, which hinges on them staying completely separate. That's in part to keep her real-life persona, but also for her own safety, since girl gamers are often threatened and harassed.
-
-
The Gaming Logs
- By Anonymous User on 03-26-25
By: Alexis Nedd
-
Foolish Hearts
- By: Emma Mills
- Narrated by: Stephanie Willing
- Length: 7 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When Claudia accidentally eavesdrops on the epic breakup of Paige and Iris, the it-couple at her school, she finds herself in hot water with prickly, difficult Iris. Thrown together against their will in the class production of A Midsummer Night's Dream, along with the goofiest, cutest boy Claudia has ever known, Iris and Claudia are in for an eye-opening senior year.
-
-
So cute and heartwarming!
- By Kimmy on 01-17-24
By: Emma Mills
-
Crying in H Mart
- A Memoir
- By: Michelle Zauner
- Narrated by: Michelle Zauner
- Length: 7 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In this exquisite story of family, food, grief, and endurance, Michelle Zauner proves herself far more than a dazzling singer, songwriter, and guitarist. With humor and heart, she tells of growing up one of the few Asian-American kids at her school in Eugene, Oregon; of struggling with her mother's particular high expectations of her; of a painful adolescence; of treasured months spent in her grandmother's tiny apartment in Seoul, where she and her mother would bond, late at night, over heaping plates of food.
-
-
Broken Korean
- By Tim on 04-21-21
By: Michelle Zauner
-
Becoming a Queen
- By: Dan Clay
- Narrated by: Dan Clay
- Length: 10 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
If only Mark Davis hadn’t put on a dress for the talent show. It was a joke—other guys did it too—but when his boyfriend saw Mark in that dress, everything changed. And now, fresh on the heels of high school heartbreak, Mark has given up on love. Maybe some people are just too much for this world—too weird, too wild, too feminine, too everything. Thankfully, his older brother Eric always knows what to say to keep Mark from spinning into self-loathing. "Be yourself! Your full sequin-y self.”
-
-
Absolutely beautiful
- By Kimberly Yeaw on 02-24-25
By: Dan Clay
-
Rats Saw God
- By: Rob Thomas
- Narrated by: Johnny Heller
- Length: 6 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
By his senior year, Steve York has come through the worst two years of his life. His parents have divorced, and his girlfriend has betrayed him. Worse yet, after running away to live with his mother in San Diego, forays into the drug culture have turned his A-average into a thing of the past. Steve's only hope to graduate on time and avoid summer school is to write a 100-page paper for his guidance counselor. Unfortunately, he has to write about something he knows, and all he knows well are the last two years of his life.
-
-
Real
- By Mary on 06-26-09
By: Rob Thomas
-
Don't Ask Me Where I'm From
- By: Jennifer De Leon
- Narrated by: Inés del Castillo
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
First-generation American LatinX Liliana Cruz does what it takes to fit in at her new nearly all-white school. But when family secrets spill out and racism at school ramps up, she must decide what she believes in and take a stand.
-
-
Stunning, funny, inspiring
- By Customer on 08-27-20
By: Jennifer De Leon
-
Don't Hate the Player
- By: Alexis Nedd
- Narrated by: Aaron Landon, Stacy Gonzalez
- Length: 9 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Emilia Romero is living a double life. By day, she’s a field hockey star with a flawless report card. But by night, she’s kicking virtual ass as the only female member of a highly competitive eSports team. Emilia has mastered the art of keeping her two worlds thriving, which hinges on them staying completely separate. That's in part to keep her real-life persona, but also for her own safety, since girl gamers are often threatened and harassed.
-
-
The Gaming Logs
- By Anonymous User on 03-26-25
By: Alexis Nedd
-
Foolish Hearts
- By: Emma Mills
- Narrated by: Stephanie Willing
- Length: 7 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When Claudia accidentally eavesdrops on the epic breakup of Paige and Iris, the it-couple at her school, she finds herself in hot water with prickly, difficult Iris. Thrown together against their will in the class production of A Midsummer Night's Dream, along with the goofiest, cutest boy Claudia has ever known, Iris and Claudia are in for an eye-opening senior year.
-
-
So cute and heartwarming!
- By Kimmy on 01-17-24
By: Emma Mills
-
Not So Pure and Simple
- By: Lamar Giles
- Narrated by: Korey Jackson
- Length: 11 hrs
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Del has had a crush on Kiera Westing since kindergarten. And now, during their junior year, she’s finally available. So when Kiera volunteers for an opportunity at their church, Del’s right behind her. Though he quickly realizes he’s inadvertently signed up for a Purity Pledge. His dad thinks his wires are crossed, and his best friend, Qwan, doesn’t believe any girl is worth the long game. But Del’s not about to lose his dream girl, and that’s where fellow pledger Jameer comes in.
-
-
Absolutely fantastic
- By Amazon Customer on 01-28-20
By: Lamar Giles
-
Every Summer After
- By: Carley Fortune
- Narrated by: AJ Bridel
- Length: 9 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
They say you can never go home again, and for Persephone Fraser, ever since she made the biggest mistake of her life a decade ago, that has felt too true. Instead of glittering summers on the lakeshore of her childhood, she spends them in a stylish apartment in the city, going out with friends, and keeping everyone a safe distance from her heart. Until she receives the call that sends her racing back to Barry’s Bay and into the orbit of Sam Florek—the man she never thought she’d have to live without.
-
-
Very sweet summer read, but a little to sexually descriptive.
- By Allyson on 06-14-22
By: Carley Fortune
-
Stay Gold
- By: Tobly McSmith
- Narrated by: Theo Germaine, Phoebe Strole
- Length: 9 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Pony plans to fly under the radar this year. Tired of getting too much attention at his old school after coming out as transgender, he’s hoping for a fresh start as a Hillcrest High senior. But it’s hard to live your best life with the threat of exposure lurking around every corner. Georgia is beginning to think there’s more to life than cheerleading. She just wants to keep a low profile until graduation...which is why she promised herself that dating is a nonstarter for the foreseeable future.
-
-
Must Read
- By Khoula on 08-17-20
By: Tobly McSmith
-
Birds of California
- A Novel
- By: Katie Cotugno
- Narrated by: Julia Whelan
- Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Former child actor Fiona St. James dropped out of the spotlight after a spectacularly public crash and burn. The tabloids called her crazy and self-destructive and said she’d lost her mind. Now in her late twenties, Fiona believes her humiliating past is firmly behind her. She’s finally regained a modicum of privacy, and she won’t let anything—or anyone—mess it up.
-
-
Does anyone edit books anymore?
- By Audrey Fine on 07-05-22
By: Katie Cotugno
-
Girl Crushed
- By: Katie Heaney
- Narrated by: Caitlin Kinnunen
- Length: 8 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Before Quinn Ryan was in love with Jamie Rudawski, she loved Jamie Rudawski, who was her best friend. But when Jamie dumps Quinn a month before their senior year, Quinn is suddenly girlfriend-less and best friend-less. Enter a new crush: Ruby Ocampo, the gorgeous and rich lead singer of the popular band Sweets, who's just broken up with her on-again, off-again boyfriend. Quinn's always only wanted to be with Jamie, but if Jamie no longer wants to be with her, why can't Quinn go all in on Ruby? But the closer Quinn grows to Ruby, the more she misses Jamie.
-
-
Cute
- By IntrovertedEnbyPisces on 06-15-23
By: Katie Heaney
-
The Smash-Up
- A Novel
- By: Ali Benjamin
- Narrated by: MacLeod Andrews, Rebecca Lowman, Dion Graham, and others
- Length: 10 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Ethan has always been one of the good guys, and for years, nobody has appreciated this fact more than his wife, Zo. Until now. Jolted into activism by the 2016 election, Zo’s transformed their home into the headquarters for the local resistance, turning their comfortable decades-long marriage inside-out.
-
-
what happened????
- By Barbara S on 03-19-21
By: Ali Benjamin
-
The One You Want to Marry (And Other Identities I've Had)
- A Memoir
- By: Sophie Santos, Joey Soloway - introduction
- Narrated by: Sophie Santos
- Length: 13 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
From the self-proclaimed Queen of the Stunted Late Bloomers and one of the most exciting emerging voices in comedy comes an honestly funny memoir about the awkward, cringeworthy, hilarious, and longest possible journey of coming of age and into her own.
-
-
If you enjoy WHGS, you'll love Sophie Santos
- By Amazon Customer on 12-30-21
By: Sophie Santos, and others
-
We Play Ourselves
- A Novel
- By: Jen Silverman
- Narrated by: Renata Friedman
- Length: 12 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Not too long ago, Cass was a promising young playwright in New York, hailed as “a fierce new voice” and “queer, feminist, and ready to spill the tea.” But at the height of all this attention, Cass finds herself at the center of a searing public shaming, and flees to Los Angeles to escape—and reinvent herself. There she meets her next-door neighbor Caroline, a magnetic filmmaker on the rise, as well as the pack of teenage girls who hang around her house. They are the subjects of Caroline’s next semidocumentary movie, which follows the girls’ clandestine activity.
-
-
Brilliant Satire
- By T on 08-28-24
By: Jen Silverman
-
Not Here to Be Liked
- By: Michelle Quach
- Narrated by: Vyvy Nguyen
- Length: 9 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Eliza Quan is the perfect candidate for editor in chief of her school paper. That is, until ex-jock Len DiMartile decides on a whim to run against her. Suddenly her vast qualifications mean squat because inexperienced Len—who is tall, handsome, and male—just seems more like a leader.
-
-
Sassy, intelligent, back to being a teenager
- By Hilary A Harris on 11-10-24
By: Michelle Quach
-
Obviously
- Stories from My Timeline
- By: Akilah Hughes
- Narrated by: Akilah Hughes
- Length: 4 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In Akilah Hughes' world, family - and life - are often complicated, but always funny. Through intimate and hilarious essays, Akilah takes listeners along on her journey from the small Kentucky town where she was born - and eventually became a spelling bee champ and 15-year-old high school graduate - to New York City, where she took careful steps to fulfill her dream of becoming a writer and performer.
-
-
Obviously
- By Wilbeaux on 01-01-20
By: Akilah Hughes
-
Bad Moms
- The Novel
- By: Nora McInerny, Jon Lucas, Scott Moore
- Narrated by: Nora McInerny
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
What happens when a trio of overworked and underappreciated good moms get pushed beyond their limits? They turn "bad" - ditch the kids, the housework, and their clueless partners with hilarious and heartwarming results. Based on the popular movies, Bad Moms: The Novel gives fans a new way to enjoy their favorite characters, Amy, Carla, and Kiki, as they smash the Perfect Mom pedestal, take on the grown-up Queen Bees, forge deeper bonds with their kids, get some long overdue respect and recognition, and indulge in a few hours of some crazy fun.
-
-
Bought the Audible version because Nora performed
- By 99Spoons on 05-23-20
By: Nora McInerny, and others
-
The Sky Blues
- By: Robbie Couch
- Narrated by: Michael Crouch
- Length: 8 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Sky Baker may be openly gay, but in his small, insular town, making sure he was invisible has always been easier than being himself. Determined not to let anything ruin his senior year, Sky decides to make a splash at his high school’s annual beach bum party by asking his crush, Ali, to prom - and he has thirty days to do it.
-
-
Beautiful. Authentic. Important.
- By Kimberly on 04-09-21
By: Robbie Couch
What listeners say about If You Lived Here You'd Be Famous by Now
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Anais
- 05-07-24
Meh
To be honest it was really boring. Took me over 2 weeks to finish it because I would loose interest. I can not believe they are turning it into a show.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!