
Conflicted Scars
An Average Player’s Journey to the NHL
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
$0.99/mo for the first 3 months

Buy for $20.63
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
David Attar
About this listen
An indispensable guide to parents of hockey hopefuls
At a time of great change in hockey, Justin Davis exposes the dark underbelly of the journey from the minors to the big leagues
Hockey culture: it’s a commonly used phrase inside the game, glorifying sacrifice, toughness, loyalty, and a sense of identity. Justin Davis viewed this culture as something he was lucky enough to experience. After all, he’d won a Memorial Cup after leading the tournament in scoring, and he’d been drafted by the Washington Capitals. “In my mind,” he says, “I was the normal one.” Unfortunately, after stepping outside the game, he began to recognize the racism, sexual abuse and bullying that was so deeply ingrained in the sport. And then, as his own children grew into teenagers, the curtain was pulled back, the memories came rushing forward, and he was horrified: “Why was I naked in a bus bathroom for four hours with seven teammates? What happened to my brain, and why can’t I remember the simplest things? How did I end up living in a basement where the strangers upstairs were clearly engaged in domestic abuse?”
As it navigates the sport’s darkest corridors, Conflicted Scars shares the story of the common Canadian player and offers a guide for parents who need to know how and why a typical teenager with NHL dreams, from a small town, now lives anxiously, introvertedly, and battling emotional detachment.
©2022 Justin Davis (P)2022 ECW PressListeners also enjoyed...
-
Scotty
- A Hockey Life Like No Other
- By: Ken Dryden
- Narrated by: Ken Dryden
- Length: 15 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Scotty Bowman is recognized as the best coach in hockey history, and one of the greatest coaches in all of sports. He won more games and more Stanley Cups than anyone else. Despite all the changes in hockey, he coached at the very top for more than four decades, his first Cup win and his last an astonishing thirty-nine years apart. Yet perhaps most uniquely, different from anyone else who has ever lived or ever will again, he has continuously experienced the best of hockey since he was fourteen years old.
-
-
Great Concept and Excellent Execution
- By Dennis E. Pipper on 04-24-20
By: Ken Dryden
-
Down and Back
- On Alcohol, Family, and a Life in Hockey
- By: Justin Bourne
- Narrated by: Justin Bourne
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Bob Bourne was everything a son wants to emulate—an NHL All-Star, a Sports Illustrated “Sportsman of the Year,” a Stanley Cup champion. Justin Bourne followed in those huge footsteps, leading his teams in scoring year after year, and finally garnering an invitation to the New York Islanders’ training camp—the same team his father had played for.
-
-
Fun read, especially for Kyper and Bourne fans
- By Happy customer on 07-21-23
By: Justin Bourne
-
Making It So
- A Memoir
- By: Patrick Stewart
- Narrated by: Patrick Stewart
- Length: 18 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
From his acclaimed stage triumphs to his legendary onscreen work in the Star Trek and X-Men franchises, Sir Patrick Stewart has captivated audiences around the world and across multiple generations with his indelible command of stage and screen. Now, he presents his long-awaited memoir, Making It So, a revealing portrait of an artist whose astonishing life—from his humble beginnings in Yorkshire, England, to the heights of Hollywood and worldwide acclaim—proves a story as exuberant, definitive, and enduring as the author himself.
-
-
Incredible! So much more than a memoir
- By Jason on 10-04-23
By: Patrick Stewart
-
Burke's Law
- A Life in Hockey
- By: Brian Burke, Stephen Brunt - contributor
- Narrated by: Brian Burke
- Length: 8 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Brian Burke is one of the biggest hockey personalities - no, personalities full-stop - in the hockey media landscape. His brashness makes him a magnet for attention, and he does nothing to shy away from it. Most famous for advocating "pugnacity, truculence, testosterone, and belligerence" during his tenure at the helm of the Maple Leafs, Burke has lived and breathed hockey his whole life.
-
-
Full of truculence, and then some.
- By Audrey on 11-10-20
By: Brian Burke, and others
-
Chris Therien
- Road to Redemption
- By: Chris Therien, Wayne Fish
- Narrated by: Mike Chamberlain
- Length: 9 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In Philadelphia Flyers orange and black, Chris Therien cut an imposing figure on the ice, a stalwart physical presence for over a decade in the NHL. But by the end of his playing career, he was concealing a much greater battle with alcoholism which bled into his professional and family life. The defenseman-turned-analyst now opens up candidly and completely, reflecting on his life and career with perspective gained from over ten years of sobriety.
-
-
Thanks Chris
- By Anonymous User on 02-24-23
By: Chris Therien, and others
-
All Roads Home
- A Life on and off the Ice
- By: Bryan Trottier, Stephen Brunt - contributor, Jesse Thistle - foreword, and others
- Narrated by: Sheldon Elter, Jesse Thistle, Lindsy Ruthven, and others
- Length: 8 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Over the course of his incredible career, Bryan Trottier set a new standard of hockey excellence. A seven-time Stanley Cup champion (four with the New York Islanders, two with the Pittsburgh Penguins, and one as an assistant coach with the Colorado Avalanche), Trottier won countless awards and is a member of the Hockey Hall of Fame and the Canadian Sports Hall of Fame. In 2017, he was named one of the NHL's Top 100 Players of All Time.
-
-
Just an Incredible book and even Better Person!!
- By R.C. Chase IV on 11-14-24
By: Bryan Trottier, and others
-
Scotty
- A Hockey Life Like No Other
- By: Ken Dryden
- Narrated by: Ken Dryden
- Length: 15 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Scotty Bowman is recognized as the best coach in hockey history, and one of the greatest coaches in all of sports. He won more games and more Stanley Cups than anyone else. Despite all the changes in hockey, he coached at the very top for more than four decades, his first Cup win and his last an astonishing thirty-nine years apart. Yet perhaps most uniquely, different from anyone else who has ever lived or ever will again, he has continuously experienced the best of hockey since he was fourteen years old.
-
-
Great Concept and Excellent Execution
- By Dennis E. Pipper on 04-24-20
By: Ken Dryden
-
Down and Back
- On Alcohol, Family, and a Life in Hockey
- By: Justin Bourne
- Narrated by: Justin Bourne
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Bob Bourne was everything a son wants to emulate—an NHL All-Star, a Sports Illustrated “Sportsman of the Year,” a Stanley Cup champion. Justin Bourne followed in those huge footsteps, leading his teams in scoring year after year, and finally garnering an invitation to the New York Islanders’ training camp—the same team his father had played for.
-
-
Fun read, especially for Kyper and Bourne fans
- By Happy customer on 07-21-23
By: Justin Bourne
-
Making It So
- A Memoir
- By: Patrick Stewart
- Narrated by: Patrick Stewart
- Length: 18 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
From his acclaimed stage triumphs to his legendary onscreen work in the Star Trek and X-Men franchises, Sir Patrick Stewart has captivated audiences around the world and across multiple generations with his indelible command of stage and screen. Now, he presents his long-awaited memoir, Making It So, a revealing portrait of an artist whose astonishing life—from his humble beginnings in Yorkshire, England, to the heights of Hollywood and worldwide acclaim—proves a story as exuberant, definitive, and enduring as the author himself.
-
-
Incredible! So much more than a memoir
- By Jason on 10-04-23
By: Patrick Stewart
-
Burke's Law
- A Life in Hockey
- By: Brian Burke, Stephen Brunt - contributor
- Narrated by: Brian Burke
- Length: 8 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Brian Burke is one of the biggest hockey personalities - no, personalities full-stop - in the hockey media landscape. His brashness makes him a magnet for attention, and he does nothing to shy away from it. Most famous for advocating "pugnacity, truculence, testosterone, and belligerence" during his tenure at the helm of the Maple Leafs, Burke has lived and breathed hockey his whole life.
-
-
Full of truculence, and then some.
- By Audrey on 11-10-20
By: Brian Burke, and others
-
Chris Therien
- Road to Redemption
- By: Chris Therien, Wayne Fish
- Narrated by: Mike Chamberlain
- Length: 9 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In Philadelphia Flyers orange and black, Chris Therien cut an imposing figure on the ice, a stalwart physical presence for over a decade in the NHL. But by the end of his playing career, he was concealing a much greater battle with alcoholism which bled into his professional and family life. The defenseman-turned-analyst now opens up candidly and completely, reflecting on his life and career with perspective gained from over ten years of sobriety.
-
-
Thanks Chris
- By Anonymous User on 02-24-23
By: Chris Therien, and others
-
All Roads Home
- A Life on and off the Ice
- By: Bryan Trottier, Stephen Brunt - contributor, Jesse Thistle - foreword, and others
- Narrated by: Sheldon Elter, Jesse Thistle, Lindsy Ruthven, and others
- Length: 8 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Over the course of his incredible career, Bryan Trottier set a new standard of hockey excellence. A seven-time Stanley Cup champion (four with the New York Islanders, two with the Pittsburgh Penguins, and one as an assistant coach with the Colorado Avalanche), Trottier won countless awards and is a member of the Hockey Hall of Fame and the Canadian Sports Hall of Fame. In 2017, he was named one of the NHL's Top 100 Players of All Time.
-
-
Just an Incredible book and even Better Person!!
- By R.C. Chase IV on 11-14-24
By: Bryan Trottier, and others
-
The Series
- What I Remember, What It Felt Like, What It Feels Like Now
- By: Ken Dryden
- Narrated by: Ken Dryden
- Length: 2 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
SEPTEMBER 2, 1972, MONTREAL FORUM, GAME ONE: The best against the best for the first time. Canada, the country that had created the game; the Soviet Union, having taken it up only twenty-six years earlier. On the line: more than the players, more than the fans, more than Canadians and Russians knew. So began an entirely improbable, near-month-long series of games that became more and more riveting, until, for the eighth, and final, and deciding game—on a weekday, during work and school hours all across the country—the nation stopped.
-
-
Fantastic, just wish it was longer
- By Michel O'Hara on 09-09-22
By: Ken Dryden
-
The Save of My Life
- My Journey Out of the Dark
- By: Corey Hirsch, Sean Patrick Conboy
- Narrated by: Rex Anderson
- Length: 5 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
By the time he was twenty-two years old, goaltender Corey Hirsch had realized his childhood dream of playing in the NHL, won an Olympic medal and drunk from the Stanley Cup. While he excelled on the ice, out of the net Hirsch was plagued by persistent dark thoughts and ceaseless anxiety. On days when he could barely get out of bed, he was able to push aside the endless loop of dark thoughts running inside his brain long enough to win a game. But as soon as he got back home, the agonizing cycle started all over again.
-
-
Amazing book if your struggling with Mental Illness
- By Billy's Kindle on 10-19-22
By: Corey Hirsch, and others
-
Sooley
- A Novel
- By: John Grisham
- Narrated by: Dion Graham
- Length: 10 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In the summer of his 17th year, Samuel Sooleymon gets the chance of a lifetime: a trip to the United States with his South Sudanese teammates to play in a showcase basketball tournament. He has never been away from home, nor has he ever been on an airplane. The opportunity to be scouted by dozens of college coaches is a dream come true.
-
-
Wow! Just wow!
- By Amazon Customer on 04-28-21
By: John Grisham
-
The Russian Five
- A Story of Espionage, Defection, Bribery and Courage
- By: Keith Gave
- Narrated by: Bob Brill
- Length: 10 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When the Detroit Red Wings were rebooting their franchise after more than two decades of relative futility, they knew the best place to find world-class players who could turn things around more quickly were conscripted servants behind the Iron Curtain. All they had to do to get them was make history by drafting them and then figure out how to get them out of the Soviet Union.
-
-
Very interesting
- By Kandace on 04-23-21
By: Keith Gave
-
Darkness to Light
- A Memoir
- By: Lamar Odom, Chris Palmer - contributor
- Narrated by: Chris Palmer
- Length: 7 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The world knows Lamar Odom as a two-time NBA world champion who rocketed to uncharted heights of fame thanks to being a member of both the storied Los Angeles Lakers and the ubiquitous Kardashian empire. But who is Lamar, really? Fans have long praised his accessibility and genuine everyman quality - he is a blinding talent who has suffered a series of heartaches, setback, and loss.
-
-
Horrible choice of the narrator
- By Tdub on 07-14-19
By: Lamar Odom, and others
-
No Excuses
- The Making of a Head Coach
- By: Bob Stoops, Gene Wojciechowski
- Narrated by: Bob Stoops
- Length: 11 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In Stoops's journey from player to struggling graduate assistant to legendary head coach, it becomes clear that his dedication to football is about far more than the sport itself. Big Game Bob, as he is known by adorning Sooners, made a name for himself not only by rebuilding the OU football program and leading the team to multiple conference championships but also by adhering to a strong set of principles at a time when corruption was rampant across the NCAA.
-
-
What a Story!
- By Teacher 4832 on 05-07-20
By: Bob Stoops, and others
-
The F*It List
- Life Lessons from a Human Crash Test Dummy
- By: Eric Byrnes
- Narrated by: Eric Byrnes
- Length: 15 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
This is more than just an audiobook. It's an attitude. It's a mentality. It's a lifestyle. The F*It List is my journey, my life, my lessons, my successes, and my many failures...in my own words. The F*It List forces action. It promotes energy and gives life. It allows you to stand up for what you believe but also helps give perspective on external situations and opinions outside of your control. It's not always comfortable, and in many instances, it is downright scary. Yet, instead of searching for the meaning of life, you will be authentically living it.
-
-
Find something else.
- By David E. on 11-04-19
By: Eric Byrnes
-
Finish Strong
- A Father's Code and a Son's Path
- By: Nate Ebner, Paul Daugherty, Urban Meyer - foreword
- Narrated by: Stephen Graybill
- Length: 7 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Nate Ebner and his father were inseparable. From an early age, they worked side-by-side in the family junkyard. Even though Nate was a great peewee football player in football-mad Ohio, he followed his father's passion for rugby and started playing for the same club as his father when he was only 13 years old. But Nate had to face the fact that there was no way to make a living as a professional rugby player in this country. So Nate gave his dad the news that he planned to quit rugby and go out for the football team at Ohio State University, with an eye toward making the NFL.
-
-
Inspiring Story
- By Dawn Ebner on 11-12-24
By: Nate Ebner, and others
-
Madden
- A Biography
- By: Bryan Burwell
- Narrated by: Mark Moseley
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Several years after his playing career was cut short by injury before it had a chance to really begin, John Madden was hired as an assistant coach by the Oakland Raiders, one of professional football's most iconoclastic franchises. Two years later he was named the team's head coach and proceeded to lead the Raiders to five championship games in his first seven seasons. Following years of heartbreaking losses in some of history's most memorable games.
-
-
Essential For Raider And Madden Fans
- By MovieGuy on 03-08-16
By: Bryan Burwell
-
My Life on the Line
- How the NFL Damn Near Killed Me, and Ended Up Saving My Life
- By: Ryan O’Callaghan, Cyd Zeigler
- Narrated by: Graham Halstead
- Length: 7 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Ryan never envisioned just how far his football career would take him. But bubbling under the surface of his entire NFL career was a collision course between his secret sexuality and his hidden drug use. As injuries mounted and his daily intake of opioids reached a near-lethal level, he wrote his suicide note to his parents and plotted his death. Yet, someone had been watching. A member of the Chiefs organization stepped in, recognizing the signs of drug addiction. Ryan reluctantly sought psychological help, and it was there that he revealed his lifelong secret for the very first time.
-
-
From the heart
- By BabyNia on 05-07-24
By: Ryan O’Callaghan, and others
-
My Life, My Fight
- Rising Up from New Zealand to the OKC Thunder
- By: Steven Adams
- Narrated by: Chris Hobbs
- Length: 6 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Steven Adams overcame extreme odds to become a first-round prospect in the 2013 NBA draft. From there he signed a major contract with the Oklahoma City Thunder - making him New Zealand's highest-paid athlete ever - and went on to forge a reputation for his intense, physical style of basketball. Adams takes you inside the draft process from the fascinating whirlwind tour of pre-draft workouts with dozens of teams to the draft itself where dreams are made or dashed and the Gatorade bottles on every table are glued shut.
-
-
Wise mate!!!!
- By Dawn M. Morris on 05-15-22
By: Steven Adams
-
Crossroads
- My Story of Tragedy and Resilience as a Humboldt Bronco
- By: Kaleb Dahlgren
- Narrated by: Adam Verner
- Length: 7 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
On April 6, 2018, sixteen people died and thirteen others were injured after a bus taking the Humboldt Broncos junior hockey team to a playoff game collided with a transport truck in a rural intersection. Crossroads is the story of Kaleb Dahlgren, a young man who survived the crash and faced life after the tragedy with resiliency and positivity. In this chronicle of his time with the Broncos and the loving community of Humboldt, Saskatchewan, Dahlgren takes a hard look at his experience of loss, but also revels in the outpouring of love from across Canada and around the world.
-
-
great
- By Anonymous User on 06-25-24
By: Kaleb Dahlgren
Critic reviews
“[A] very powerful, raw memoir calling into question many aspects of a hockey culture that glorifies sacrifice, toughness, and loyalty.”—Library Journal
“This is a deeply introspective, brutally honest memoir and a stark exposé of a part of hockey that remained hidden for far too long.”—Booklist
“I loved playing in the OHL, the second-best league in the world, and I have loved my life in the NHL. Justin’s book should be on the shelf of every hockey parent. He has some amazing stories … and every former player will vouch for them. Canada loves hockey, and rightly so, but we have to make sure the kids come first. I am glad my friend wrote this book.”—Joe Thornton, 22-year NHL veteran and Hart Memorial and Art Ross Trophy winner
What listeners say about Conflicted Scars
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Beverly Murphy
- 08-21-23
A Real Hockey Story
This is a fantastic book that offers a peek into the insane world of junior hockey. From the toxic initiation rituals to the power hungry coaches and GMs, this story tells it all in great detail. This book should be required reading for all parents contemplating sending their kid to play junior hockey.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!