
Collaborating with the Enemy
How to Work with People You Don't Agree with or Like or Trust
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Narrated by:
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Jeff Hoyt
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By:
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Adam Kahane
About this listen
We're trying to get something done that really matters to us. To do this we need to work with others. But these others include people we don't agree with or like or trust, so working with them seems impossible - like collaborating with the enemy. What can we do?
International consultant Adam Kahane, whose work has been praised by Nobel Peace Prize winners Nelson Mandela and Juan Manuel Santos, has faced this challenge many times in working both on big issues, like economic restructuring, climate change, and civil war, and on ordinary issues within organizations and families. He has come to understand that everything we think we know about collaboration - that it requires a harmonious team that agrees on where it's going and how it's going to get there - is wrong. On the contrary, the only way to get things done with diverse others is to abandon harmony, agreement, and control and to learn to work with discord, experimentation, and genuine cocreation.
Kahane proposes a new approach to collaboration - stretch collaboration - that is built on this insight. He offers examples of how he's helped people apply it in all kinds of tough situations throughout the world. This approach requires stepping forward with openness and commitment, as in the words of poet Antonio Machado, "Walker, there is no path. The path is made by walking."
As our societies have become more polarized and globalized and our organizations have become less hierarchical, more of us need to collaborate across more heterogeneous groups than ever before. This means that increasingly often we face situations where conventional collaboration does not work. Kahane's book offers a proven and practical approach to getting things done in such complex and conflictual contexts. It could not be more timely.
©2017 Adam Kahane (P)2017 Adam KahaneListeners also enjoyed...
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- Unabridged
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Mining the best and brightest revelations from Franklin Covey’s global podcast, On Leadership with Scott Miller, Scott personally introduces you to 30 Master Mentors, featuring the single most transformative insight from each of them.
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Name dropping, shallow content, false humility
- By Sandy McPherson on 09-13-21
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Decoding Greatness
- How the Best in the World Reverse Engineer Success
- By: Ron Friedman
- Narrated by: Ron Friedman
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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For generations, we’ve been taught there are two ways to succeed - either from talent or practice. In Decoding Greatness, award-winning social psychologist Ron Friedman illuminates a powerful third path - one that has quietly launched icons in a wide range of fields, from artists, writers, and chefs, to athletes, inventors, and entrepreneurs: reverse engineering.
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Good book, but needed better research
- By aaron on 08-29-21
By: Ron Friedman
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The Ugly History of Beautiful Things
- Essays on Desire and Consumption
- By: Katy Kelleher
- Narrated by: Cindy Kay
- Length: 8 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Paris Review contributor Katy Kelleher explores our obsession with gorgeous things, unveiling the fraught histories of makeup, flowers, perfume, silk, and other beautiful objects. In these dazzling and deeply researched essays, Katy Kelleher blends science, history, and memoir to uncover the dark underbellies of our favorite goods.
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Lovely work
- By Anonymous User on 06-25-23
By: Katy Kelleher
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As We Speak
- How to Make Your Point and Have It Stick
- By: Peter Meyers, Shann Nix
- Narrated by: Peter Meyers
- Length: 8 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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A practical and empowering guide to public speaking and becoming a more effective, persuasive communicator in all areas of life. The world is full of brilliant people whose ideas are never heard. This book is designed to make sure that you’re not one of them.
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Roadmap to finding your voice.
- By Claudia & Jason Ransom on 01-31-23
By: Peter Meyers, and others
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Game Changer
- How to Be 10x in the Talent Economy
- By: Michael Solomon, Rishon Blumberg, Daniel Weizmann - contributor
- Narrated by: Rishon Blumberg
- Length: 7 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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10xers can tackle a company’s toughest problems, improve their strongest assets, and blaze a path to success. With the rapid digitization of every conceivable product and service, the environment has transformed so fast that every organization must be equipped with these phenomenally gifted employees to keep up. Game Changer provides proven strategies on how your company can create the right environment for top talent and breakthrough success by upending traditional business practices.
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Good learning material for those on traditional corporations
- By William on 10-19-20
By: Michael Solomon, and others
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The Arsonist in the Office
- Fireproofing Your Life Against Toxic Coworkers, Bosses, Employees, and Cultures
- By: Pete Havel
- Narrated by: Pete Havel
- Length: 5 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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The Arsonist in the Office is your survival guide for enduring the toxic workplace (and toxic people) and a call to action for a bold new approach to addressing tough issues. If you have ever led an organization or participated on a team and felt completely frustrated by the sabotage of another colleague, leader, or even a client, this book is for you.
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Required Reading
- By N. M. on 06-02-21
By: Pete Havel
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Your Difference Is Your Strength
- A Guide to Accepting Yourself -- for Anyone Who Has Ever Felt Out of Place
- By: Kris Ferraro
- Narrated by: Kris Ferraro
- Length: 8 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Your Difference is Your Strength is a book for anyone and everyone who has ever felt out of place, misunderstood, or just...different. It’s the book for the kid who was too creative or too shy or too “weird” and who grew up into an adult who still isn’t quite sure where they fit in or if they even want to. It’s a book for you. In Your Difference is Your Strength, Kris Ferraro, author of Manifesting, invites the oddballs and underdogs of the world to stop hiding, minimizing, or disguising their differences and instead embrace them in a powerful new way.
By: Kris Ferraro
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Dead Doubles
- The Extraordinary Worldwide Hunt for One of the Cold War’s Most Notorious Spy Rings
- By: Trevor Barnes
- Narrated by: William Gaminara
- Length: 10 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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The astonishing but true story of one of the most notorious spy cases from the Cold War—and the international manhunt that seized global attention as it revealed the shadowy world of deep cover KGB operatives. Based on new archival material and inside sources from around the world, Dead Doubles follows the hunt for the highly damaging Portland Spy Ring. This incredible narrative, layered with false identities, deceptions, and betrayal, crisscrosses from the UK to the USSR to the US and New Zealand, and brings to life one of the most extraordinary spy stories of the Cold War.
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For Spy Junkies
- By P.Adler on 08-30-21
By: Trevor Barnes
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Improve Your Conversations: Think on Your Feet, Witty Banter, and Always Know What to Say with Improv Comedy Techniques (2nd Edition)
- How to Be More Likable and Charismatic, Book 10
- By: Patrick King
- Narrated by: Russell Newton
- Length: 3 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Improv(e) Your Conversations teaches the ingenious rules of improv comedy that allow performers to turn boring prompts into memorable interactions worthy of standing ovations. This means there are real frameworks and templates to escape interview mode small talk – and start connecting and building rapport from the moment you say “Hello”. This book goes through over 15 of the most helpful and insightful improv comedy techniques with countless real-life examples to make you a great talker.
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it's okay
- By zak frisch on 11-28-22
By: Patrick King
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How to Think with Intention: How to Identify, Transform, and Apply Mindsets for Control, Confidence, Growth, and Freedom
- Clear Thinking and Fast Action, Book 10
- By: Patrick King
- Narrated by: Russell Newton
- Length: 3 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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How to Think with Intention dissects some of the most powerful mental blocks we can have: blocks in belief, confidence, self-protection, and growth. These have been deeply programmed into us, and while that’s not our fault, it is now our responsibility. You’ll gain incredibly actionable approaches to noticing and changing your thoughts, and ultimately controlling them.
By: Patrick King
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The Promise That Changes Everything
- I Won’t Interrupt You
- By: Nancy Kline
- Narrated by: Nancy Kline
- Length: 9 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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How often do you interrupt? How often do people interrupt you? Can you remember the last time someone listened to you all the way through your thinking? In her new book, Nancy Kline, best-selling author of Time to Think, makes this radical proposal: 'I won't interrupt you' is a promise that changes everything. It deepens relationships, spawns dignity, raises the intelligence of groups and enriches every conversation. It may, in fact, be the most important promise we ever make. And the hardest to keep.
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Life changing
- By Patricia Narvaes on 03-03-21
By: Nancy Kline
What listeners say about Collaborating with the Enemy
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Darren Johnson
- 01-02-25
Pretty Good
It’s a good book to get helpful tips on how to deal with people that you don’t see eye to eye with. I recommend it.
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- Dr. T.
- 05-05-23
Interestingly, impactful
I found the book to be interesting and useful in changing one’s mindset. But the way to get there was not fully flushed out. It is more of an invitation to seek self discovery. But I’m not sure I would call it a how to book. I am encouraged to approach my own concept of collaboration differently.
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1 person found this helpful
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- mlff
- 07-04-18
Simple, yet critical shift in perspective
This book offers a simple, yet a critical shift in perspective. In an increasingly complex world where agendas are unlikely to align, an essential skill is to be able to align actions for mutual benefit instead. In just a few hours this book helped me see that collective progress is more valuable than shared purpose. Highly recommended!
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3 people found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 06-01-24
The book wasn’t what I expected
I thought the book was mostly antidotal. I’m had to stop listening at the 4th chapter and I haven’t really learned anything new so far. The author enjoys talking about how smart they are so I think the message of lowering expectations of having it your way and seeking to forge a joint path forward may have been a bit muddled for me.
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- Reba
- 06-26-22
Last chapter the best advice
Last chapter has timeless, excellent advice for all, for all situations.
I didn’t get much out of the beginning of book. Glad I continued to the end. Shows I’m already on my way to being open to listen to others thoroughly.
Definitely a keeper book! Refresher from time to time.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Tya
- 11-10-24
Force, adapt, exit or collaborate.
Enjoyed perspective. If you’re not part of the problem then you can’t be part of the solution. Less energy on blaming. More energy on doing your part.
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- The Knoble 1
- 12-03-24
being willing to work with Others.
I Enjoyed this Book Given Insight to working with others as well as being open Minded to others and their Ideals and include the Whole
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- Anonymous User
- 03-27-25
Brief yet rich and informative
I enjoyed the structure of the book and plenty of real life examples as illustrations. I feel the author got the point elegantly across without needing to use too many words. The narration, for me, was at a perfect speed for me to be able to follow and process.
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- Dale
- 11-24-20
Interesting concept but short on details
While the concept this author offers is interesting and unique, he falls way short of providing details on how to implement it.
He does give a conceptual outline and interesting stories that support the model however does not provide a framework on how to implement it on your own.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 12-21-23
not exactly what I was looking for
the book didn't touch on some of the areas it's summary indicated. I picked up a few ideas but overall it left me wanting something different.
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